eve

a poem about a woman, abandoned with child by her lover, confiding to her friend

upon looking at the man's face,
i turned to the woman beside him,
in a moment, i was alone with her,
in a cloister or a basement room,
somewhere cold and dark as whispers
she took my hand, and felt my pulse,
like riders in britches, horses,
galloping, my heart is only fodder
for the pain, feasting on its skin,
deep within its flesh, worming out
she said, i look like the bones of a funeral,
i was wearing red, i didn't look it,
she knew, i heard wedding bells,
without a groom, beyond the aisle,
only love, only a child, only a cradle

Reviews

[Fabian G. Franklin]

This is sad...but somehow hopeful. I guess photographs have that effect upon me too sometimes...you know, the old, odd ones where you just wonder who the people were and why they seem so sad.

[highonwords]

i get that feeling, too, sometimes it's the other way around - why am i so said, when others are so happy - life is strange - which makes me sadder - but i really don't go there, looking after that feeling - i just let it go

steph

[Fabian G. Franklin]

Sometimes being too introspective can interfere with life and the living of it so, yes, I understand. But life is a wonderful, beautiful, fabulous adventure! It's full of miracles and blissful scenery! It has its horrors and atrocities too...but what do we focus on? I choose to love and seek my inner peace and joy. I wish the same for you my new friend.

[highonwords]

thank you so much, fabian, for the thoughtful gesture - much appreciated :)

steph

[barleygirl]

Your vignette imparts many powerful feelings that could apply to other situations, not just the one described in your byline. I got a little confused which "she" is the friend the narrator is sharing with & which one (if any) is the "other woman" (possibly?) But those confusions didn't detract from the reading of the piece. I like the way you describe pain in very original terms. Heartbreak is written about so much, but it's rare to read it being compared to a powerful trampling horse. Love this & many other analogies.

[highonwords]

hi margie - an uncle of mine told me that when a woman is pregnant, her pulse and the pulse of the child inside her beat in sequence, sometimes simultaneously - so i compared it to riders and horses - glad you like that - i am so sorry about the confusion - will tweak it somehow - thank you so much for the wonderful visit and insightful review - much appreciated :)

steph