rubenesque you, dense and heavy, on my heart's palm, with a strong sheen a pungent scent you make me burn you paint my skin, the same color, as your eyes, dawn, curdled on fire same time, God found you, a woman lurking in the way of His wide-set eyes the desire of men, to hold, in flesh, in blood, in bones, his whole life - to pour as water pours out of God's mouth the green jungle, is in my veins, i look for you, in the horrors of night, the face of our child, on constellations, where our names have been drawn, since time was a cog, in the throes of waking
Once again, almost unintelligible to my PERSPECTIVE while reading this poem . . . often I will not comment on poems I don't understand. I don't want to assume the problem is with the poem. It might be a problem with my ability to understand. But in your case, I do want to comment becuz your writing is so amazing. I love your flow, your imagery, your total inhibition about throwing in wildly unexpected elements, describing them so vividly & poetically. Your originality is thru the roof! Good job on these very challenging aspects of writing.
peter paul ruben painted women, attractively plump - this means the w.. read morehi barleygirl -
peter paul ruben painted women, attractively plump - this means the woman has made a 'big', serious impression on man - she has made him passionate - God knew Eve would be good for Adam - God, himself, was fascinated with Eve - He told Adam to take Eve under his wing, to love her with all his life - he is particulary troubled when he couldn't find Eve, it's like the whole Garden of Eden turned upside down - he would look for Eve everywhere - they were meant to have a family, since God conceived Eve in His dreams
always,
steph
8 Years Ago
I really love your writing. I love your messages, once you explain. I think some poetry just needs t.. read moreI really love your writing. I love your messages, once you explain. I think some poetry just needs to be explained further in the author's notes. Some of us aren't very good at reading figurative writes. You can't imagine how much we literal ones appreciate a little guidance in reading poetry such as yours.
8 Years Ago
i'm so sorry i gave you a difficult time - it should be that the reader should never be made to work.. read morei'm so sorry i gave you a difficult time - it should be that the reader should never be made to work hard by the writer - my apologies - will explain anytime it is needed
I see a husband thinking about his wife, or a man about a woman...
People need companion in this life. Someone who will stay by our side. Someone who will understand us or feel how we feel. Someone who will be with us to build a family.
Well-done piece of writing! Keep it up.
Posted 8 Years Ago
8 Years Ago
thank you, ate dhaye, for the visit and the review :)
kind of that adam and eve feel....she was made for him---and he in his lack of intelligence imagines she was made to serve him...and then finds out much to his surprise...that he depends on her for sustenance much more than he would ever expected...
i like the really short lines...expedites the rhythm...to a nice fast beat.
i wrote this like God was dreaming a woman (Eve) for Adam, that women were created as an equal compa.. read morei wrote this like God was dreaming a woman (Eve) for Adam, that women were created as an equal companion of men - with an equal footing in life - meant to be complementary to one another - thank you, jacob for the review and visit - glad you like the beat of the poem
my best,
steph
8 Years Ago
and they should be complementary to each other...some men are just not too bright.
NOTE: Formerly my pen-name on this site is letterhead, but since i also have an account on DeviantArt, with a different pen-name, which is highonwords (stephanie) - i am going to use highonwords here .. more..