The Shifting Winds of Sanity 1-4

The Shifting Winds of Sanity (2011)

 

Alas, how easily things go wrong!

-George MacDonald

 

  I.

In the next apartment, I hear shouting--

  The sound of love nearing its end,

Then it's followed by a soul's pouting--

  The sound of lovers caught in sanity's shifting wind.

 

  II.

I step outside for a cigarette and still hear crying,

  For a letter of hope the gods failed to send.

How does one cope as emotions lay dying?

  And all are tossed around by sanity's shifting wind?

 

  III.

Lying in bed, I imagine a world less trying--

  It's almost as hard to imagine as it is to believe in;

A world someday silenced of all crying--

  A world where we all find shelter from sanity's shifting wind.

The Shifting Winds of Sanity, II (2012)

 

Alas, how hardly things go right!

-George MacDonald

 

  I.

Something has tripped me again,

Leaving me face-down in the sand,

And turning my smile into a frown--

 

  II.

The powers that be

Are green with envy for me;

A secret the wind tells only as it brings me down--

 

  III.

But yes, I still dream;

As true and as free

As I did before the breeze paced my steps--

 

  IV.

Though it may seem odd to most,

As if I were possessed of some ghost,

The answer lies in the secrets I too have kept--

The Shifting Winds of Sanity, III (2013)

 

And yet how easily things go right

-George MacDonald

 

  I.

As the wind picks up once again--

An old ghost says

She now remembers me more clearly--

 

  II.

And with my luggage packed safely away--

I now seem--to her--

So much less dreary--

And now, I'm thinking:

If--Indeed--

 

  III.

I have come such a long way--

Then leave me lie--

To forever find rest this way.

The Shifting Winds of Sanity, IV (2016)

 

This is my letter

to the world that never wrote me...

-Emily E. Dickinson

 

I spent my life,

And I spent it looking down.

From the precipice

All the way to the ground.

But the distance between here and there

Never seemed so close to me as it does now.

 

To my shame, I

Find myself praying now

That a surprise

Wind will come and take me down;

As that might be the only way I will rise above.

Maybe there I will find the meaning of life and love.

 

Oh, what in me has changed so much that I

 

Now feel that I must escape this life?

Oh, what in me has changed so much that I

No longer feel I can overcome this tide?

Should I leave my impression in the ground below?

Let that expression be my resounding note:

The letter of all of my grief

To a world that never wrote to me...

 

Well, I suppose,

It's as much worth the try

As it was to experience life.

Oh, what in me has changed so much that I

Now feel that I must escape this life?

Oh, what in me has changed so much that I

No longer feel I can overcome this tide?

 

Could it be that I--

 

Spent my life--

And spent it looking down?

From the precipice

All the way to the ground.

Either way, the distance between here and there

Never seemed so close to me as it does now.

Reviews

[light and ashes]

I have to review this, because it is so good. As I work on this review my mind is in a mad flurry of words like a Snow storm pounding against my brain.
In these words, I reminded of your incredibly rich soul..
which I saw immediately, but I forget from time to time.

Your last writing was the most meaningful to me.
So much has transpired between you and I....
There is so much that I could say to you about this piece of writing in particular, though they are ALL great.

I suppose, the most pertinent thing I could say is that.....

I am writing to you now, in place of the World, just like I did before.
Just like you have done for me.
Only we know how incredibly lonely and f**ked up both of our lives has been individually.
Only we can speak to eachother's pain and into eachother's void.
I am here now speaking love into your void,
and I pray that it echoes through-out it for the rest of eternity. (Ugh, I feel tears).
Because of us, we know that someone in the World cares.

I care. I will always care, so I am speaking to you, in place of the World....
into the void, that it so carelessly created.

[Wesley Dingler]

Wonderful sweet love. This is the grreatest review ever written. For me at least. I remember whenyou wrote this and told me I didnt have to write anything in return. You lied. I do have to say something in return.
You are the greatest thing south of the Lord I have ever known.
The mere fact that you can speak into my void at all is worthy of award. And the fact that you are the greatest thing in life that has ever happened to little ole me is worthy of volumes. Not justa few lines.
It has been my greatest pleasure to lie next to you every night and wake next to you every day. It has been the greatest gift in life to love you and to be loved by you.
Who needs rhyme and meter? I simply have to say it has been both my pleasure and privilege to share the past few years with you.
I am beyond greatful to know you and to know you love me.
I love you girl.
I will always love you.
You took my despair and replaced it with love and challenge and a warm embrace.
I cannotthank you enough for being yourself and for being my love.

[Betty Hermelee]

Are you always looking down from the precipice of something like a cliff??? to the the despair of your life?
You mention this several times in the poem. I wonder if suicidal thoughts are a possibility. It seems that you have tried to live your life in relative peace, but something has driven you to a kind of grief. If the wind takes you down, then you will eventually find solace maybe in the"above"....the ending may be peaceful to you as you get closer and closer to your end. Well written, food for thought.
Best, B

[Wesley Dingler]

No I am not always looking down. Much of my work from my 30s is happy and positive. Nevertheless my life mostly from age 12 to 27 was turbulent uncertainly and quite depressing. I am fine now though. I look as if upward is forward. And for me it is.

[Betty Hermelee]

I’m so glad you were able to overcome! Not so unusual for young to have much darkness….. bestread moreI’m so glad you were able to overcome! Not so unusual for young to have much darkness….. best
B.