Sorrow.

Sorrowful and lonely.

Desperate and loathsome.

She walks down the street, alone.

Nothing but the wind at her side.

She remembers a brighter time.

A time when she was happy and delightful.

Loved and surrounded.

But those times are gone.

Theres no way of gaining it back.

Hes Gone.

Sorrowful and lonely.

Desperate and loathsome.

She walks down the street, and looks up at the dark night sky.

And shes asks, Why?

Author's Note

Im new to poetry but im trying, i hope you like it.

Reviews

[roarke]

Poetry is hard for me because I never know where it's going in the process of writing it. Here, you have a theme: Sorrow. Everyone coming into the poem has a pre-set definition of sorrow. Then you move it in a direction that might not be part of the preconceived notion.

I wonder if after a while people experiencing sorrow stop asking why eventually? This poetry is un-glossed, direct and personal. I'd say you've got the hang of poems. Thanks for a well written thought.

[Crusaderscross]

It is quite good for a new writer. Feels like something I would write. I find it quite dark actually. The feeling of always looking back to be happy because the NOW is unlivable. Really good poem here.

[Liz-z]

Incredible... O_O It's impressive for somebody who's new to poetry! =D
Fantastic job, really!
"But those times are gone.
There's no way of gaining it back.
He's Gone."
So very sad, yet beautiful to read... Fantastic job...
Each line fits perfectly!

[MiidniightSoul]

It's a sad poem. It's beautifully written and has a dark and lonely aura, as the person walks alone in the empty streets . Excellent.

[Moonflower]

this was simple yet full of pain and longing. it feels dark and desolate, with no chance of hope or happiness. I liked it, good write :)

[Creepy Swine Guy]

I think it's wonderful. The only things I wonder about are line four, which seems like it has a few extra words (to this old man's ear) I might have tried ...

"Only the wind at her side."

Also, the word loathsome ... is that the word you want? Is she contemptible, repulsive? Or is she feeling great contempt? This might be EXACTLY the word that you want ... I'm just asking. If it IS the right word then I have a better understanding of your poem. If it's NOT the word that you wanted ... maybe that word is "morose" or "resentful".

I'm no expert, but I offer these humble thoughts for a poem which I very much enjoyed. (95)