The first walk.

Ring. Ring “Hello?”

            “Hey Stephanie, do you feel like going for a walk?” Asked Marc one night. This started a friendship that would bring a lot of pain but at the same time it would bring life back to normal for me a little.

            “Sure Marc. Where do you want to meet?” I asked.

            “Just outside my place. If that’s okay with you?” he asked.

            “That’s fine. See you soon.” I said, sounding happy and hung up the phone.

            I never got to hangout with Marc that much. As I told my Mom I was leaving to go for a walk with Marc I could feel the nice cold air. But it wasn’t so cold that you couldn’t feel anything. It felt like one of those nights were you want to just have your music as loud as you can get it to go and dance down the street because it just feels right. You might look dumb as hell but at that moment in time, it was the right thing to do and you just couldn’t hold yourself back. I remember all the water around my shoes because it had rained that day. As I got to St. Mary’s Rd I could hear all the cars driving down the street going to where ever they needed to go. Life at that moment almost felt beautiful. I felt beautiful just being there the way life was. As I walked up to Marc’s door I didn’t want to stop this feeling. More then anything I wanted it to go on for hrs. But I knew at some point it had to stop because in life all things have to stop. That’s just how it works. His door opened before I could even get close to it. I could hear this 2 dogs going nuts in the background.

            “I’m going for a walk with Stephanie. I’ll be home soon.” He yelled at his Mom just before he closed the door behind him. We started walking down St. Mary’s rd. We talked about my work block and how life was going. We talked about who we liked and how things could be better. I never knew in my whole life that us walking that night would change both of our lives for the better. What made this night so much better then all the nights that followed it was for the first time in a long time I left like someone other then my family cared about me. Cared about the fact I couldn’t get out of bed everyday and cared that I did good. Just having him walk beside me and talk to me like I was a real friend made me feel like there was a reason why I was still here. And that night just before I walked up to my door and just before I couldn’t feel my toes anymore because they were so cold, the reason I’m here is because I’m here to help the people that care about me. And as I walked in the door I couldn’t hear my dog because he was already in bed with my Dad.

            “Mom I love you.” I said as I walked up to my room. And for the first time in months, I didn’t cry before I fell asleep and I couldn’t wait to get up the next day.