june

june

A Poem by ava
"

another one from grandma series

"

june


on the ninth he handed us 

your pearl necklace

and your

wedding ring,

tight and neat

in a little bag.


on the sixth you turned off

your alarm clock,

folded your clothes,

organized your papers�"

old letters, 

crossword puzzles,

opened your window.

and on the seventh,


in the early morning

before the sun

you flew out

and up.


twelfth

all the seats 

were filled

finally felt 

tears 

hitting 

my lips. 


my mom has your hands,

your wrists,

ears, 

skin,

eyes

knees.

© 2011 ava


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Reviews

*O my* Strength and economy. Excellent line breaks in this well thought out work. I was pulled in from the first line. A couple of minor quibbles: I think when you cut and pasted from whatever you use as a word processor a couple of typos were inserted. There is an orphan quote mark in the line "organized your papers" and an odd character (a square) in the line "were filled"

If it were me, I wouldn't use the word "hitting" along with tears on your lips. I understand the visual, but for me it's as strong a visual as the rest of the poem provides.

Make no mistake. I love this work.

Posted 13 Years Ago



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Added on February 18, 2011
Last Updated on February 18, 2011

Author

ava
ava

Asheville, NC



About
The only thing that separates me from [other] animals is a lot of words, so when i'm not talking much, the gap closes really quickly. There is so much I want to do often times I don't know where to.. more..

Writing
sometimes, sometimes,

A Poem by ava