Zombies'n'S**t Ep. 21

The Tell-Tale Heart

Sophia hung her head a little.  Mary lifted her hand with my heart again to point and all I could do was watch, fixated on my own heart, "Sophia, you need to get over this rebellious streak of yours or you could get someone hurt. I understand that you have had a rough time, but not to lessen your suffering, we all have been having a hard time.  But if you keep this up, people might take action, then," she held her arms to either side and shrugged, my gaze never wavering from the one hand, "Even I can't help you.  You need to understand, we are a community, not just survivors.  We need to work together and try to make things easier for each other.

"I know your brother really didn't deserve what happened to him, and you need to understand no one blames you for Penny," Sophia visibly cringed at the names, but Mary went on.  "They saved so many others, don't let their sacrifices turn you against everyone."

"Francine sure is ready to blame me," Sophia muttered spitefully.  Mary sighed, arms drooping- heart still clenched in one-"Francine-" She started, "Francine is trying to maintain order and keep everyone safe and sane.  She doesn't blame you for Penny, she is just venting frustration that she wasn't their for her sister."  She gestured out to the main area (with the hand with my heart, I noted), "Max has forgiven you because he understood the pressure you were under.  Francine has a harder time accepting her sister is gone; it's the grief talking.  Don't get angry with her in return for the loss of her sister.  She will come around eventually."

Sophia hung her head in shame, "I guess you are right.  Sorry, Mary."  Mary nodded and held her arms out, "It's fine, sweety.  Come here."  Sophia walked over and gave my heart a look before they embraced.  Mary muttered, "Oh, sorry!"  She set my heart down on a table and they gave each other a big warm hug.

"PUT THE HEART BACK, WOMAN!!!!"  I roared.

Oh, s**t.

Author's Note

Absurdly proud of the title on this one.

Reviews

[unspokenguilt]

OMG yes it is revealed! The title does suit it. I didn't see it as anti climatic via johns part as you mentioned that his eyes were trained on his heart the whole time and before mentioned the violating feeling so for me there was no rushed feeling.

[C. Rose]

I recommend unpacking the dialogue in this section so that whenever the speaker changes we get a new paragraph.

I'd like to see some emotional build up on John's part. I like the line "Put the heart back, woman!", but it felt too sudden. Maybe describe how having the heart out feels like and if anxiety is building.