Autumn Leaves

It's not all mists and mellow fruitfulness...

In Autumn, leaves blow everywhere,

Around my feet, and in my hair.

Although their colours might impress,

Good grief, they don’t half make a mess!

They’re dry and crunchy, for a time,

But when they’re wet, they turn to slime.

So walk with caution on damp grass,

Or else you’ll end up on your a*s!

 

Each time I open my front door,

A pile of leaves drifts on my floor.

Just like a dirty brown snowfall,

They litter my once tidy hall.

I have to sweep them all away

About a hundred times a day!

 

The Summer gave us flowers, fair,

Now Autumn’s trash lies everywhere.

A messy garden’s not my style,

I rake the leaves into a pile,

I put the rake away, and then -

The wind blows them all back again!

 

Some poets like to celebrate,

The sight the Autumn leaves create.

But I prefer them when they’re green,

Trees covered with a verdant screen.

Autumn means the year is dying,

Leaves fall like tears, trees are crying.

Much shorter days, the weather’s bad,

And lack of sunshine makes me sad.

 

So poets, please don’t waste my time,

Telling me Autumn is sublime,

Unless you want to feel my wrath,

Go fetch a broom, and sweep my path!

Author's Note

If you enjoyed this poem, why not check out my new book entitled, ‘Things Can Only Get Verse' - a collection of humorous poems on a variety of subjects, including: social network addiction, self-service checkout machines, having a hangover, internet dating, dieting, online auctions, getting older, and more. Available on Amazon for only £4.00/$6.00. Life is more fun when it rhymes!

Reviews

[JoeM]

I loved your poem. As I said to another contriburtor, I don't usually go for poems, but I'll check out all your other ones.
Although here in New Zealand we have only indigenous evergreens, we still have imported oaks and elms, et al, so I'm aware of what you communicate so well. Purely just for tempo, I offer a couple or three suggestions. I hope you take it in the spirit given..
..on THE damp grass. ..a brow snowY fall. ..once AND tidy hall. ...times AND EVERY day.AS I rakethe ...
...The wind THEN blows then back atgain...trees are A-crying. Yeah, I know, Hardly English, but what the hell, it's poetry. ...is SO sublime. If I'm up the creek, just keep going, as I love your sense play and humor.

[Viv Wade]

Thanks Joe. I appreciate your suggestions, and I've looked at the lines you mention, but they seem to work to me! I tend to count the number of syllables in each line, to make sure it has the right rhythm. Maybe it's down to individual enunciation - it's 'cos you're reading it with a New Zealand accent! :)

[Robert Haigh]

A highly entertaining read, which raised a few smiles! But also a poem full of truth! I like autumn, but all those pesky leaves can be a nuisance and a mess! A fine poem!

[Viv Wade]

Thanks Robert! I wrote this last autumn, and now it's almost that time of year again... better go and get the rake out! :)

[emmajoy]

' Autumn means the year is dying, - Leaves fall like tears, trees are crying. - Much shorter days, the weather’s bad, - And lack of sunshine makes me sad. ' - ( so true) . However ..

.. laughing here. i love trees, leaves, Autumn and its glorious colours... but.. oddly, love and understand your poem and its depth of feeling! Did I mention that I'm also a landscaper so know the value of dead leaves! packed into a holey bag, left for the following year makes good mulch and such!! (For me but.. free info!)

I laugh and understand your superbly metered poem because so much of what you say here is true and you say it with great humour and maybe, just maybe, tongue in cheek. Maybe?!

That last stanza - okay... am on my way! Happy New Year, Viv!

[Viv Wade]

Thanks Emmajoy, and a Happy New Year to you too! I'm glad you understand where I'm coming from with this poem, even though you love autumn and have a use for the dead leaves. I appreciate the free info - thanks very 'mulch' for the tip! :) Thank you for taking the time to read and comment.

[Philip Muls]

Very funny. The down to earth side of autumn leaves, not so poetic. Well done.

[Viv Wade]

Thanks Philip, I appreciate you taking the time to read and comment!

[Gee]

Lol,like this and the dig at others enjoying the autumnal littering.A rhyming poem always sits well with me.Sweet

[Viv Wade]

Yes, I like rhyming poems - if they don't rhyme it feels like cheating to me! Thanks for taking the time to read and comment, Gee.

[Gee]

No problem,my pleasure

[Chris]

It felt more of a "rant" than humorous... a sense of underlying frustrations.

[Viv Wade]

Yes, I suppose it is a bit ranty. I find poetry a good way to vent my spleen, sometimes! Thanks again for reading and commenting.

[Chris]

I hate it when I see a work had 10 - 20 views and not a word!...but many people have lil to say anymore - least 'til they do.

[ReverieJones]

I live on a two-acre wooded plot of ground, must have three hundred trees around. So I've spent the last bit of October and most of November raking and mulching the damn things up, only to have more fall. Your poem said how I feel quite well. I too am tired of people waxing on the beauty of autumn. I've never thought of it as the trees crying but that thought eloquently fits the end of summer and the coming of the dark winter. I very much enjoy reading your work.

[Viv Wade]

Thank you Reverie, it's nice to know that someone appreciates the stuff I write! I'm looking forward to reading some of your work, when you post some on your page. I'm glad you agree with me that autumn can be a very tedious time of year!

[Samuel Dickens]

Heh-heh, you tell it like it is, Viv. It's great when you've got kids to do the dirty work, but they always leave! (Get it--leave?) What you say about the lack of sunshine is so very true, and I find myself leaving lights on to fend off the blues.

[Viv Wade]

Yes, I think hibernating animals have the right idea, I feel like going to sleep in autumn to avoid the dark depressing days of winter, and not waking up until the spring. Thanks for taking the time to read and comment, Sam.