Rejection Letter

It is amazing how small minded the poetry magazines can be.

 

 

Dear Sir

We have declined your current submission

And offer some friendly advice

 

Your words lack rhythm

It is unlikely that you will gather many fans

To follow your style of writing

 

Your descriptions were too graphic

Our readers have a sensitive nature and

Might be offended by such raw emotion

 

Your poems need to be left aligned

Centered poems are considered to be

Amateurish

 

We hope that you will try

One of our poetry contests

For a small fee

 

 

Read more about Alex at:

www.Suburbanfiction.com

 

Author's Note

This was a collage of absurd statements from several actual rejection letters.

Reviews

[Poeticpiers]

Editors and readers are so far out of touch it is almost unbelievable.At the moment they seem only to consider free form despite their comments about rhythm and ryhme. Poetry competions on the whole are scams and will publish anything to extract money from hopeful writers Ithink the way ahead is self publishingFor myself I am quite happy with the feedback I get from readers on the net No body grows rich from writing poetry.Having said all that I enjoyed your poem

[lavenderlassie]

I went to a book review a couple of months ago hosted by three authors. Each had received hundreds of rejection letters. Some of the best sellers on today's list have been rejected, so dust off your shoes and move on to others. I will look forward to reading yours, however.

[Gandré]

ha..........it is a preference thing.........nothign else. i read unbelievable bad poetry .......from their chosen poets. the only thing one can do is to do nothing.

[Helen Woodward]

HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Yes they would know their readers by name and that they are all sensitive, but that isn't the worst of it, I cannot believe the ignorance of these people and their God-like attitude on centering etc!! All publishers are aliens and must be destroyed! So glad you have a book on the hop...hard work isn't it? It took me three years to get my first one published. It is a good thing you have posted this as a warning to those who are new to this game...and it is a cruel game...the first rejection is the hardest. You have done well with the collage, I LMAO...
Cheers,
Helen :-)

[Debbie_Philly]

Oh this is priceless and so true.....Wonderful poem and VERY WELL WRITTEN !!!

[Trix]

i love
"Your poems need to be left aligned
Centered poems are considered to be
Amateurish"
and yet, you still write it centered.
i love it.
especially since they are incredibly stupid in their statement.

[1809 Black Plague Decem..]

awww man, I've been written also about my writing, and it's a low blow to be not appreciated; oh wells bells, ---xxoo, mishel

[Aldora Sparrow]

Wow! Did people actually say that? How cruel! I read some of your other ones and they are beautiful! You have your own style! Keep it up!

[Mike Carson]

You keep dragging me back in here, lol! I like it a lot! I found a web site last year where they celebrate the worst poems you could write and send them to those contests that prey on writers...sort of a gleeful turning of the tables...wicked fun. To win, you have to write the most awful poem imaginable and then get it accepted by a site like uh, lets say Poetry.com for one.

[Nickolaus A. Pacione]

I got a few of these kind of letters but the rejection letters sometimes in two words. One editor told me via LiveJournal in two words, and two choice words. I made a joke saying does he have rectal cancer or prostate (I didn't care which one the m**********r had. Just wished he had the one that hurt the worst.) Politely gave me the middle finger and told me to get out of the business, He got the double f response.
�����One of the reasons I am a short story author, and in some ways with being a horror author I can say some rather nasty things and get away with it. Science Fiction on the other hand I can actually voice my right leanings without getting in deep s**t unless I am writing a cyberpunk story which has maximum carnage. Having the flip flopping Senator (I am talking about Kerry here) introducing himself to a noose. I've actually insulted one or two submitters because they did a contest anthology that insulted my intellegence. So I basically got mad and bounced every contestant (the b******s later admitted they faked the contest trying to make it something I actually sanctioned.)

[The Philosopher's Noteb..]

I love it!

It's feels that the I am the one being rejected...