The Shadow Fiend

Awakened by a thud above my head

I gripped the sheets of my bed

But my hands grasped nothing more

Than cold damp earth,

Above me like a guardian of hell

A single knocker in the shape of a heart

and a door of solid oak its perch.

Surrounding me on all sides

The pitch black darkness

of an abysmal hell.

Surrounded by earth and clay

With nothing more than this door

Above my head,

Fear began to wash over me

As deep as the piercing black

Surrounding me, piercing me,

piercing my mind, piercing my very soul.

I wished to shriek but found no energy

To make my wailing heard,

I wished to know why this demented

Fate had been chosen to befall me,

And as if an answer to my wonderings

I looked above my head,

And the heart shaped knocker

Lifted and fell, lifted and fell

And with each iteration,

A noise that of which I had never heard

Beset my ears.

The noise was that of a million screams

A noise of which I do not think

I would hear even in my darkest dreams.

As the screams grew louder and louder,

A cacophony of agony so great overtook

My minds dreadful urge to scream.

Then as soon as it had begun, it silenced

And the door began to open.

I had hoped to see light

As an ending to this nightmare

But all that flowed into the, what my

Mind now perceived as my casket,

Was more darkness, but this darkness

Was stained a darker shade.

It not only was the absence of light

but the feeling of a cold warmth

Accompanied it.

There was a feeling that inside this dark

Abysmal pit of darkness

Stood something.

Whether man or beast I do not know,

but I could feel it, and I fear it could feel me,

not knowing the intention of this new force

I decided not to verbally or physically assault it

But I hoped that it was friend, but what lives in darkness

I fear may be foe.

“If there is anyone out there in this sea of darkness,

Speak to me.”

I waited for a reply to assuage my fears,

But from the darkness not a word was spoken

I could feel my heart begin to beat faster.

“I ask if you are friend or foe please let yourself be known”

But again the darkness did not speak back to me

And from within the darkness I could feel

The presence, take a step

Or was it my imagination

the darkness playing tricks on my senses.

“ I ask again, If you are friend or foe please let yourself be known”

My heart began to pound against my chest as if wishing

To escape, before whatever horror lies in the pitch black

Finds me, now I could sense breathing coming

From the dark, the breathing was slow, methodical,

As if every breath was accompanied by a step

Of this beast or man, my body now began to quiver

I felt as if this darkness would now swallow my body

As it has already swallowed my mind

I cried out once more.

“ If you are friend or foe please let yourself be known”

From the darkness no reply still, no words, no gestures

Just the breathing getting louder and louder

And the cold warmth I felt before began

To increase in intensity

And there before me stood this presence

This creature who locked me away

And now will do with me what he wishes

And from my mouth now the creature so close

I could feel its breath on my face

I asked

“ Please shadow fiend, let me be, let me go”

And as if horror could be described in but one word

The creature that torments me here in this blank void

This monster that makes my mind cry out in agony

This monster that has the knocker of lost souls

 all the monster uttered to me was

“No”.

Reviews

[Shaquana Adams]

Whether man or beast I do not know,
but I could feel it, and I fear it could feel me,
not knowing the intention of this new force
I decided not to verbally or physically assault it
But I hoped that it was friend, but what lives in darkness
I fear may be foe.
“If there is anyone out there in this sea of darkness,
Speak to me.”


I feel like you have a good concept here, but the poem seems longer than it should be. I think you should try to put the same concept into fewer words. Throughout the poem, I realized several spots where it seemed to linger. I hope I helped. Good work! :)