June 2000 -4

Jun 22

 

There is something I wanted to write about Anne. I have been reading another book about her, a Japanese one that a girl from class has lent me. Near the end of the book, there was a description of the place they were held at. Turns out they were all first taken to Poland. I had just come across a TV program about that concentration camp this morning! There, everyone under 15 years of age was sent to a gas chamber straight away. Everyone else was handed a plaque with a number and they had to line up holding the number absolutely naked!! Anne and Margot ended up dying in another camp from typhus. That was told by some survivors. And then, when they got transported, they were put on the trains that were stuffed to excess. The people could barely move for 3 days. And of course they did not have toilets! Those people were absolute monsters! How could they have done such heartless things?! And that whistleblower that busted Anne and the family! Right before that happened Anne wrote such hopeful things!

 

I finished watching Basketball Diaries, because they were repeating it on TV. The story is about three friends who played basketball together but got involved in drugs. One got rescued by a good friend who locked him up and was able to clean himself up and became a famous writer. One of the other friends is a homeless now and the last one is in jail. We just had been talking with dad about drugs on Sunday. Drugs are so bad! I feel sorry for the addicts. They commit crimes not because they want to but because of those substances. Would have been good to lock up all of the addicts somewhere so that they get over the addiction.

 

And what about other criminals? They do what they do out of dire necessity or they must be sick also. It is impossible for a healthy person to be able to kill! There have to be circumstances to blame. Even the TV said that the majority of perpetrators have had bad parents. Still, must be nearly impossible to change anything. Anne is right when she says "the people are really good inside".

 

Jun 23

 

This topic is a little weird. Perhaps you know that most girls in the 2nd grade of junior high wear bras. I don't want to think about it but it's in your face. And they seem to be wearing a different one every day. I am not looking on purpose, you just can see through the blouse. I really don't understand them. And everyone wears mini skirts. We are allowed to do that on a regular day but during an assembly, you can't fold them up. But most try to do it anyway, so it it folded but it's not very obvious. For what? Who is meant to be looking at them? Do those 5cm change anything?

 

Jun 25

 

Last night I went to take a bath and took a text book with me to read aloud because I hadn't studied much. First I read normally and then I tried reading it in different voices. That was fun! As I took a shower, I sang all songs that I knew. My voice sounded better than usual.

 

Today we got up early and drove to the airport to pick mum and Pete. I love the airport! I fell in love with this airport because of Australia. I was remembering the Australian holiday as we drove and regretted that I hadn't been writing the journal in detail back then.

 

Pete had had a haircut and he grew taller. He looked as if he was 9 or 10  (In reality he was 7). He spoke Russian better than he used to. He has been taught obviously! Mum started complaining and chattering away about her grievances towards people over there as soon as she was off the plane. She complained about grandma doing things that she always does herself! It's funny. I got annoyed with her then but I feel good now. Mum got glasses and she looks smarter in them. They look good on her. She brought a lot of things like cassettes, paintings and books. The books were great apart from the one titled "how to behave yourself with boys". I am looking forward to reading them but have to do homework for now.

 

As mum got home she started yelling that the wall has paint on it. But it's always been there! In any case I haven't been painting anywhere near it!

 

Jun 26

 

I thought a lot about Russia today. I really want to go there this summer. I want to go soon before everyone gets too old. Otherwise Stacey and others will get too old and it will be boring (Stacey is a far relative I used to play with who is a year older than me). Wonder how I can pull it off?

 

In school, we had to make groups for an upcoming filed trip. I have been deciding if I want to go for weeks but the teacher said it is compulsory. I stayed near the wall the whole time wondering what will happen. I wouldn't even consider approaching anyone myself. It did not really matter. Eventually a couple of girls called me to join them. I felt very embarrassed and teary.

 

Mum was in a good mood today. I asked her about going to Russia and piercing my ears. She did not object to the earrings! Yay! Can't wait!

 

P.S. Today I tried being a little fake around mum. I kept hugging her and telling her things that I twisted a little so that she wouldn't get mad. Does this mean that I am starting to understand life better? I wonder if this is how the grownups always operate?