Hiding never helps you just miss out on the good stuff
The Fortress Tell me the reason you hide behind walls? Built so high that no one can climb them, Hidden deep within a fortress, Of your own design, What is your damage , That made your heart cower in fear?
Is'nt it lonely there by yourself? Could'nt you trust me just a little? Look into my eyes and grant me an audience, With the person who though bruised and battered and scared, Could command my heart, At his slightest whim.
I'll whisper your name, In the sweetest of voices , And plead my case even if the jury is in , And dare you not to see me, Not to feel me in your every breath, Not to yearn for me in your very soul.
I label you a liar if my words you deny, I curse the day and damn the hour, You locked me out and condemned us both, To days with no end , Where the rising crescendo of sadness,
You hold a lot deep inside sharing it in words to seek the wills of comfort, Some do put up walls in life , its very sad but true the world can be a cold damp place, but its up to us to stand strong within it all and walk away with a smile, we smile because the beauty among all things the good the bad the ugly we take it all within and embrace it:) Your a wonderful in depth writer:)
Posted 11 Years Ago
2 of 2 people found this review constructive.
11 Years Ago
You have spoken so wisely and your words are very true thank you for your kind words
Wow: the empathy, frustration, compassion, love; bare truth... To add something to Lydia's and Sami's reviews is perhaps unnecessary, however, for example -
"I label you a liar if my words you deny,
I curse the day and damn the hour,
You locked me out and condemned us both,
To days with no end,
Where the rising crescendo of sadness,
Is not a threat but a promise."
You describe this so well, the imagery and the structure work perfectly, a thoroughly marvellous read, Vinya.
If someone does not want you to cross the moat they have built around their heart, it is impossible to get there. All the pleading and begging in the world will not change that. You are right, it is very possible this person feels as you do, but if he or she is not willing to admit it, you will become more and more frustrated by the day. It is better to walk away. Filled with honest emotions, your poem is well written. I liked it. Lydi**
Posted 11 Years Ago
11 Years Ago
Oh thank you so much for your wonderful words and what you say is true sometimes people are just to.. read moreOh thank you so much for your wonderful words and what you say is true sometimes people are just too scared to move forward and push those who love them away.
"I'll whisper your name,
In the sweetest of voices ,
And plead my case even if the jury is in ,
And dare you not to see me,
Not to feel me in your every breath,
Not to yearn for me in your very soul."
Wow. I just saw this one ....The title , the poem and other aspects are all wonderful.