INITIATION ULTIMATE, Chapter 21.2: Narrated by Saphara

Nightmares and problems haunt Saphara. Now, she must prepare for her brother to leave her in the Initiations, too.

Rede studies Talaimai's face.  “Just look at you.  You may be an excellent Warleader, but how will you lead them effectively if you can barely keep your eyes open?  You look exhausted.  You deserve time off.”

            “That’s not possible, Rede,” Talaimai persists.  “I’ve already made my Vice do enough work recently, especially with…” his voice drops down to a whisper, but with the way he looks toward Attenti and me, my heart falls.  We both must be burdens to him, particularly me.

            “It is possible,” Rede says firmly.  “What you and I are going to do is walk down to the wall and tell your Vice that he’ll be commanding tonight.  We will not take “no” for an answer.  I promise you, everyone will agree.” 

 

Attenti and I watch as our guardians depart on their mission.  “We brought back a lot of food that Talaimai earned,” Attenti lets me know.  “We distributed it equally throughout the tents.  I guess we should just eat dinner and get some rest while they’re gone,” he plans.

Frantically, I shake my head.  "No.  We can't do that.  We need to go with them!"

"Chill, Saphara.  Look at them.  They'll be alright.  We should let them have some time by themselves anyways, don't you think?"  Attenti's looking at me with his head tilted to the side, his attentive brown eyes giving me a look of amusement and concern.  Why is he looking at me like that?  Doesn't he know what will happen if we let them go down there?  "We can tell stories," Attenti thoughtfully tries to persuade me.  "Funny ones about our lives.  Like the time my friend thought shaving cream was..."

"Sorry, Attenti. I need to stop them...  Or Rede will get hurt!"  Standing up, I sprint in Talaimai and Rede's direction, only to find that they've already reached the bottom of the plateau.  No.  No.  I have to get to them, but I can't fall off of the plateau like Attenti nearly did!  At least sound can travel faster than my feet, so I attempt to use it to my advantage.  "Talaimai!  Rede!  Stop!  Stop!  Come back!"

No answer.

When I reach the bottom of the plateau, Rede and Talaimai are standing side by side and looking uncertainly at me, their expressions twisted in confusion and slight impatience.  I don't care.  They can be impatient with me, but at least they're safe.  "Come on back!  Quick!" I shout.

"What are you talking about, Saphara?" Talaimai asks calmly.  As soon as the words leave his lips, large, glowing gold eyes appear in the darkness behind him.  They come closer and closer, and as much as I want to say something, the words just will not come out!  

"R - Re..." is all I can manage, trembling because I know exactly what will happen next.  And then the creature leaps, seizing Rede's lower leg between its teeth and injecting its venom into her as it draws blood. I desperately want to do something, anything, to free my friend.  All I can do is stand and stare as the creature drinks away at her blood, her life.

***

Terrified, I snap awake.  Beads of sweat moistening my forehead, and frightened tears drain from the corners of my eyes.  It takes a moment before I can breathe again, and more than a moment before I have enough courage to crawl outside of my tent and race to Talaimai's for safety.  "Tal.  Tal.  Tal," I tremble, shaking him awake.

"Go back to bed," he grunts, pulling a rabbit fur pillow over his head and rolling over.

"Tal... I had a bad dream... Tal..."

Groaning, Talaimai sits up.  I can barely see him blinking in the darkness, rubbing the sand from his eyes.  For a moment I'm reminded of 382 waking me up, and I feel... I feel...  Ugh.  I've been too preoccupied to feel homesick lately, but seeing Talaimai behaving just as I do when my sweet little sister wakes me hits a nerve. Suddenly, all the homesick pangs and family longings I've saved up for so long erupt, and all my feelings flow from my eyes like a river of tears.  Of course, that only reminds me of Rede's reaction the day that she caught me crying.  She had brought me to the hand print cave so I could feel like a real Initiate.  Now that she's gone...  I choke back a sob, shutting my storming eyes.  When I open them, Talaimai's wide awake and staring at me.  "What are you wailing about?" he asks me, somewhat insensitively.

"I had a bad dream," I repeat.

"As we all do..?" Talaimai comments, nodding me to continue.

"It was about Rede," I begin to explain.  "Getting attacked by the Cantiko.  When it bit her, it drained the life out of her, and she died.  I wanted to save her, but there's nothing I could do.  I couldn't even move..."

"Rede is safe," my brother tells me in a monotone, his voice resolute.  "She's home now, back in the U15.  Rede's a strong person. I assure you, she can, and will, make it through this."

Am I hearing things, or is there a slight tremor in his voice?  What if Rede is not alright?  What if there's no antidote for the venom that the Cantiko injected into her veins, and she's dying in a hospital thousands of miles away?  It's too much for me to think about, and talking to Talaimai about my thoughts would only worry him.  I try ignoring my thoughts and instead try to focus on the best.  I mustn't look satisfied, however, because Talaimai lets out a long sigh and puts a hand on my shoulder.  "Go back to bed, Saphara.  You'll reawaken feeling better."

"No...  My restlessness will stay, I tell you.  Can you... Can you explain some things to me?" I ask anxiously.

"Go ahead," Talaimai allows with a nod.

"The Cantiko that bit Rede... has it... is it..?"

"It has been taken care of."

"Why were you gone for six days?"

"That's confidential to the New Initiation Shores Clan."

"If it's confidential, why did you bring Attenti?  And not Rede?  Or me?"

Sliding a hand across his forehead, Talaimai mutters something under his breath before answering me.  "Attenti was shadowing a trade in a distant area of the Initiations while I focused on my work, and I didn't contact Rede because I knew she would disapprove of the tasks I had to complete.  I didn't bring you because I believed the trip would exhaust you, and I didn't want to st..."

"But you brought Attenti!" I cry out indignantly, anger overshadowing the terror of my dream and everything that came after it.  "I can do everything he can do!  Why do you only teach things to him?"

"He was the only one who asked for my help!" Talaimai exclaims, volume matching that of my own.  "So I got him a temporary job shadow so that he could learn.  If you wanted help, you only needed to ask!"

"But, I need to learn just as much as Attenti does!  So you automatically assume that just because I'm too shy to ask you, I don't want any help?"  I argue.

"Are you too shy to ask?" Talaimai hisses.  "Because you certainly don't seem so right now!  Go back to bed, Saphara.  It's -"  There's a little beep, and a cheap watch lights up beside him.  "Three forty-eight in the morning.  And yet you have the nerve to enter my tent in the middle of the night sobbing and demanding answers from me!  I need my sleep, and you've obviously woken up on the wrong side of the bed!  You are in the wrong, Saphara!  Leave this tent!"

The warm feeling of jealousy and embarrassment warms my already wet cheeks, and I back out of his tent, containing my cries until I re-enter my own.  How can I ever learn to love my brother like my little kid self did if he never supports me?  If only he knew that I would willingly do any tasks he'd give me.  If only the journey to find the Exodus was enough to prove my strength and perseverance to my brother.  If only the journey to find the Exodus was enough to prove my value to get out of here.  If only my little sister was instead my twin so that if I decide to leave early, I won't have to worry about her adapting to the Initiations all by herself...

Funny how problems evolve.  If only they didn't exist.

***

When I wake up the next morning, I'm surprised to see that Talaimai hasn't left for his job yet.  Instead, he has cooked a warm breakfast for Attenti and I over the campfire.  After we eat, Talaimai announces that he has decided to depart for home in a month.  During this time, his Vice Warleader will be taking over the job of Warleader so that my brother can monitor his stress level and make sure he has the proper experience for long term commanding.  As Talaimai's only job is to check in and monitor the Vice now and then, he will have plenty of time to train us.

"And your training starts,"  my brother checks his watch, "now.  Listen up, Initiates.  Here's the plan."

...As one problem disappears, another flourishes into existence.