My Escape Goat

005007008 340P

If I decide to take you in
Would that release me
From the shadows
Of the past better left forgotten

If I breathe you in
Deep into my lungs
Would you let me escape
From this misery of you

If I stick you into my veins
Will I finally be free
And feel the calmness
That I've been craving within

Author's Note

Listening to Coma White by Marilyn Manson

Reviews

[Kelly D. Burris]

Haven't heard the song but I love this piece. Those types you want to run from and quickly!!!
It's all so good it's hard to pick something specific.

If I stick you into my veins
Will I finally be free
And feel the calmness
That I've been craving within

I guess this that speaks of peace, that's all that's needed with this.
A fav for me!

[W.k.kortas]

I like the piece very much as far as it goes-- it's well-constructed, and flows quite nicely--but it feels unfinished to me, as if it needs some resolution or good-old-fashioned, Aesop-issue moral. There's quite a lot to like here, but it doesn't feel whole.

[Geist]

This one really got me to thinking of what I used to write, back when I was able to. The style you used deffinately reminds me of my own. :p

Favorite lines would be...

"If I breathe you in
Deep into my lungs
Would you let me escape
From this misery of you "

Makes me think of someone giving up their soul to a greater power in a way. Someone who has lost all their will.

A very good poem written by a very talented poet, indeed. ;) I really love this one, an awesome-o job you've done!


Geist