Murdered in Kindness

003025008 216P

Last night you came to me
In a dream you came to me
Right here in my arms
You bled uncontrollably
I couldn't stop it from flowing
The blade I had implanted
Was much too deep
I was in great pain
I could not think
All I remember was the silence
When I could no longer hear
Your heart no longer had a beat
I caused you your demise
Yet I shed tears for you
Now I feel so alone inside
And I wish I had died
Along side of you

 

 

Reviews

[Chaos]

Yes, this is a nice example of a confessional poem. I enjoyed this piece. However, the meter went off in some places and disrupted the flow a bit, but overall it's so beautifully sorrowful.

Chaos~

[Imperfection]

I caused you your demise
Yet I shed tears for you
Now I feel so alone inside

I can somehow connect this to my life. I regret certain things in the past. I wish I wasn't able to relate to it as much as I can. This hurts. Your poem hurts badly.

[Chloe..Across the Unive..]

V.. a long time since i read you ..
this is great, filled with such sadness it makes me sad.
and seems like there is some remorse .. what a great poem .. sad though .
Chloe
xoxo

[*~Poetic_Essence~*]

I must say that I like the underlying rhyming going on..it makes it flow well..I do not know if it was on purpose or not but either way it is effiecient..i also like that you use a little bit of imagery throughout the poem..this is a sad poem but i think you executed it well, you make me think and feel for you and the fact that you are all alone makes me hurt for you too..i enjoyed the read...
Well From One Word-Play Poet To The Next...Always Remember To Write With Your Heart!

s~Shanty~s