A Letter for My  Mother

A Poem by vesukas

I can’t forget you as a child,
even though I never knew you then.
And I became the pale shadowed image of your legendary beauty,
never seeing the sadness you bore.
And I wore the mark of your silver
on the crooked fingers
I could never wash clean.
How did you create me
into this being you still haven’t seen.

I see you now, as the girl in the painting,
hiding behind the woman,
you had never agreed to be.
And remember you well,
when I catch my reflection
In the sad puddles of yesterdays rain.
Why did you leave me in your likeness,
with footsteps that could never be filled.
How could you think they wouldn’t mock me
for our differences, so obviously seen.

So our joys were always heard as the roars of laughter,
no one could mistake for tears.
And our miseries were plainly understood as one,
knowing the bonds that tied our fears.

Answer me one question
before the banished return
and the quickness of my inquiry
will be easily over thrown.
Do I worship the weak fool
who’s been blinded to her pasts favorers.
Or shall I pity the goddess on exile,
removed from her fame of beauty.

I never did get a chance to thank you
When you left me to grow all alone.
I became who I am untainted,
Because you never planned for the way life unfolds.
Now what I have are visions,
Of a grown woman, who looks just like you
She has the voice, the reasoning, the standards
And all of the miseries too.
When I see her around, I’ll be sure to tell her,
That you loved her as much as you could.
And let me apologize for her
and the trouble she caused
When she became that
pale shadowed image of you.