I’m growing up.
the ones around me have to accept
the choices I make, the roads I want to walk.
I don’t want to make anyone upset
by getting black coffee in my white cup.
I want to see the perfectly shaped fumes
rising from a heart-made cup of tea,
Warming my trembling hands as I
take my first few steps.
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I like this poem a lot, but your punctuation is very bad. I will show you how to fix this very easily to make a very nice sounding rhythmic poem.
I’m growing up[.]
the ones around me have to accept[ ]
the choices I make, the roads I want to walk.
I don’t want to make anyone upset[ ]
by getting black coffee in my white cup.
I want to see the perfectly shaped fumes[ ]
rising from a heart-made cup of tea,
Warming my trembling hands as I
take my first few steps.
Simple omitting of a couple commas can greatly move the reader down the page and really make them feel the nice rhyme you have. The addition of a period in the beginning helps build tension before the release. Tell me if this helped you. Thanks. Great poem
There always is that point in time where we all must grow up and whether people like it or not, they must accept it. Once we grow up, they must accept the many diferent choices that we make.
Posted 14 Years Ago
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It is hard for a parent to see their babies grow up. A very good poem. When we feel strong and have free will. Life become a new journey. I like the complete poem. The ending was cool too. I need coffee in the morning. A outstanding poem.
Coyote
i love this. to me the poem speaks of the first few and akward steps into adult hood. wanting that acceptance for your choices...wanting to drink coffe out of whatever cup you want....i think its great! we all go through that phase when we want to be see a certain way and we want affermation on the things we do
I grab every opportunity, life is my sincerity, and my sincerity is bliss.
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