Fake Gold

The poem is about how everyone has a different take on someone else's success. It may not be in the way the achiever may want it to be...And its also about those fake people who pretend to be with u.

The story which has to be told ,

Started with the color as haughty as gold.

The majestic chandeliers were shining brightly,

While the champagne glasses made the atmosphere dizzy slightly.

The diamonds were a common sight,

It was their own way of having a silent fight.

So it was a splendid night,

Where people had gathered only to show off their might.

On the walls hung the arts of the century,

What it meant to these people was just plain mystery.

It was apparent that they weren't there to join in the artists glory,

They were there to overpower his with their own successful story.

The ladies were murmuring about how much fame he earned,

Rather than thinking about the satisfaction fr which the artist yearned.

The men were busy pondering about how much money the artist must have got,

Rather than praising his work they barely appreciated but with high price tags were all bought.

The crowd, busy posing for flashing cameras and their own thoughts,

Forgot all about the star of the evening who was someone for which they should have sought.

The artist who at the gallery was considered the richest was actually the poorest at heart,

For his paintings had become a famous board and he a dart.

The fake people were jealous of his fortune not his work,

They envied his fame not his piece of arts bright spark.

They could not appreciate his work,

For they were just not of worth.

And so the artist with a lousy heart,

Sat down by the fireplace of the side-room in the dark.

Confused by the beauty of his own painting,

And also the way people were lamenting.

Everyone took his success in a different way,

But his heart was just going astray.

Only later did he realize,

That everyone could not have a view with which he would sympathize.

Everyone was different ,

And so for them was the meaning of his success and might....

Author's Note

Please tell me about any mistake you note or any change you fell should be there. Tell me what you think of the poem...

Reviews

[Bear]

Critique: (Rather than thinking about the satisfaction fr) for
Advice: Poetry is read with a rhythm and when you have short and long sentences you change that rhythm disrupting the flow so in future poetry you should try keeping each line close to the same number of syllables.

Review: Seeing that you are from India I assume English is not your native language, I wish to compliment you for both your courage and grasp of English. Your rhyme scheme is fantastic and shows you are articulate and word savvy, you phrasing shows you are aware of what is current and the topic is trendy, I look forward to reading more of your works of literature. Standing Ovation! Clap! Clap! Clap!

[VP]

First of all , thank you so much for reading and reviewing my poem.... This is my third writing piece and I'm really trying to improve .... Yes English is not my native language but I'm still trying . You are right , I have noticed that that the length of the sentences vary a lot . I will definitely keep that in mind ! Thanks again for your advice ! I really appreciate your writing a review ! :) :)

[justdandy]

yes, I would have to agree with Bear. Perhaps you can divide the poem into stanzas, to make it flow more. Also (my opinion) I would suggest you to use another font. It was kind of hard to read it.

Over all I really like this poem. Very descriptive. Keep up the good work. :)

[VP]

Thank you so much . I will keep that in mind ... And yes I will divide my poem in stanzas from next time . thanks again ! :)