Fiction

I dream I had

And this is the last time I will ever see that face. That beautiful face, with smouldering brown eyes, a smile that's worth a million diamonds, and soul of a fallen angel. I knew one day this would happen. I just didn't know when. How. Anything about it...

***

I couldn't help but be the happiest person in the world. Since you've left, i've missed you so much. But you seemed fine with ought me. It's been hard. Very hard. I have no light in my life, and being able to spend one day with you, just with you, and no one else, would mean the world to me. But of course, the things you want never completely come true..

"Hey guys! Wait the f**k up!" Screamed Andrea from down the road.

"How the f**k did they find us? honestly. I thought tho was just going to be a day for you and me Jess, just us, like old times."

"I didn't know.. that..." she sighed "I don't know how they found out okay, i'm sorry." Jess explained.

"Ok, I get it. I'm just kinda of being selfish here, but I just wanted to spend the day with you, and that's all.." I tried to say.

As they came closer and closer, my heart beat faster and faster, my head spinning more and more. I love these two, Andrea, and John, but I wanted to just spend the day with Jess. And just her. We needed to talk before it all happened. Before it all ended, and I just wanted to spend one last day with her, laughing, smiling, telling secrets and stories of what's happened since we've parted. And i understand they want to see her too, but today was our day, the one day i was able to get off, to be alone with her, for once.

"WHATCHA GUYS DOINNNNN" Andrea yelled in our faces obnoxiously. 

I can't even concentrate on the conversation right now. I get it. He, she, Andrea, whatever gender it decides to be day by day, just agitated me so much. I love her. A lot. She never gets on my nerves, just today, the one day i have alone, that's what's killing me, and John can see it in my eyes. He knows me best out of anyone, and knows how important Jess is to me.

"DENA, shut the f**k up, you're so f*****g annoying." John continued "I think right now is not the best time, we should go somewhere else."

"But i wana see Jess..." said Andrea.

"We can come back later, right now, i'm gona punch you in the face if you don't leave with me. You have a phone, she has a phone, it's called texting. Lets go."

Andrea gave me the sadest look, in which all i could do was sigh and look at John. He was worried and annoyed. But what else was there to do..

We walked away, back to her house, to spend some much needed time together, and the last moments of our lives together.

***

She was sitting there, on the dirty old carpet, of the basement floor. The lights flickering on and off dully, while she looked down into her hands. The hands holding a brompton cocktail, while i just sat there and watched. I had tried to tell her before, that It's all worth it, to live, and stay happy, with me and Dena and John and even Karleigh.. but this is what she wanted. I had fought with her about it for 2 years now, and didn't know what else to do except accept it. Because I knew it would hurt her more leaving this world, knowing everyones sadness, then to accept it. So i did. I sat there and let her do her thing.

She looked up at me, looked to the side where the vodka was, and started to concoct. Taking the vodka bottle, screwing the lid off, and pouring it in a tall glass. Then taking a hand full of different sizes, colours, and shapes of pills, just dropping them in.

"Bottoms up" Is all she said as she started to down the drink.

My mind began in a panic. I knew this was going to happen, and i don't know how to stop it, i don't know what to do because this is the end of it, the end of it all.

"Hold me vammy?"

"Anything." I choked out.

As i took her head into my arms, and stroked her hair, her breathing began to slow. This is when i took the cellphone out of her hands and called the cops, soon to be on their way. But by the time anyone got there, it was too late. In the silence, the last words. 

"Jess, i love you more than you'll ever know or understand, i never wanted you to do this, but i didn't know what to do, i didn't want you to end it being all sad, i wanted you to be happy, i was hoping you wouldn't do it in the end, but i feel horrible because i couldn't save you and and..."

She put her finger to my lips. "shhhhh..." she slurred.

"you did save me, thank you." and then her last breath slid through her soft lips, and i could feel her soul slipping away from her body, away from me, i'm trying to grasp her, trying to make her stay, but i can't, she's already gone. So i sit there, holding her lifeless body, hunched over, and started to cry in the silence. That's when the cops came in, and took her from me. Grabbed her and put her on a stretcher, leading to a hospital. And i just sat there, with a blank expression on my face, not knowing what to feel, so i just felt. I just sat there and cried.

***

"I heard what happened." Said Andrea.

"I CAN'T DO IT, GET THE F**K AWAY FROM ME. IT'S MY FAULT!" i screamed and thrashed, and broke down in the middle of the street, falling into the gutter, as the wind began to blow harder, and the leaves began to fall off the trees and landed in front of me. It's all over now. That's it.

****

Girl found dead in bed after heart attack

A girl, formerly known by her friends as vammy, was found dead in her bed earlier this morning. Suspected to have died from a heart attack due to night terrors, the teenaged girl will be missed. 

****

I layed there. Feeling the drop in my soul, after i woke up. The worst nightmare ever. Was she really dead? I don't know yet. But all i know is that even though it was all a dream, i can't stop crying, and i don't even want to do this anymore. So i took the brompton cocktail, chugged it down, and lay peacefully in bed. Waiting for my soul to slip out.

Author's Note

I wrote this a year ago but for some reason it didn't publish the actual story, only the title. Sorry for this, I have re-written it. I know this is kind of random, but this is exactly what happened in my dream :S