I shall and my words

Combination of events I have recently experienced and remembering my past.

With a scalpel I shall carve out happiness for me

I shall demand no less of others than I would ask of myself 

And yet I shall not throw tolerance out like candy at children

Fickle and fleeting, TOLERANT, brokenly used

I shall surround myself with good staff

I shall trust not in you whose blackened fingers point at me

I shall tarry not with gloomy, sullen somes

I shall muddy not to those whom my eye is fixed

I shall bury my hatchet in the sand and give it rest

To him who knows me best, the agony of my soul

The carnage of the depravity that is my self destructive tendencies

He shall cast out my demons and mend my scars

From the ones that a man stole and raped

From the ones parents suffered upon me

From the ones liars prancing as friends presented

From the oppressors who take my voice and my liberties

From all those who hate me so 

I will take up the cross and walk beside him 

Looking to my brothers and sisters at arms

Together we walk side by side, our march a tethered one

The dark places of dreary times will not be spared

For each he will send punishments due recourse

To which I am not to be so commander of

My duty is to the west and the east with a heavy heart I go

Seeing the tired, yearning masses, I will weep

My sorrow is but a bucket but a lifetime and more he has wept

Sums of your accusations is reflecting mirrors of your inner fears and pain

Anger ravages whipping internal dialogue

When the foundations rot it must be torn away

Revelations strike a cord, when the cards fall

Each stained with the ink of the past printing frame

Misery was not the code of this life

Yet you chose it freely so

To this I leave you to your devices

And take my fill of the cup everlasting

Arrogant and crude words bitter and tipped

Selfish, rescue me...describe me please?

I’m listening 

What more have you to speak against me?

Discord sowed is reaped in paid full sum

Blameless be not the word I choose

Sinner and wretch I am

Pay me no heed if these words be minscule

By your estimate my esteem is tarnished 

But your lack of tact is evident

Take this notice, I am not afraid 

Bionic plaster will fix no holes in you

And I give you unto him who is blameless

My end may it be here, being for the good 

Not for the bad