Hidden personality

Poetry speaks

Hello there,

you on the other side of the wall.

We talk through the door,

we talk about it all.

Backs against the stone,

crouched down on the floor.

Speak hush, between us.

No lies, all secrets, all alone.

Hello there,

you on the other side of the wall.

We plan and we talk,

through the door we keep locked.

I hold the light given by righteousness,

as you sit in dark afraid to walk.

Let me lie, let’s switch sides.

No good, no evil, just selfishness.

Hello there,

you on the other side of the wall.

Just you, just me.

So far away,

Yet only a few feet.

I have the key,

I made the choice,

so let us meet.

Hello there,

you on the other side of the wall.

I walk through the door,

and I see it all.

Hands against the stone,

Kneeling on the floor.

No words, only hush.

No smile, all scars, all alone.

Hello there,

me from the other side of the wall.

Reviews

[Lyn Anderson]

I am reminded of Girl interrupted. An interesting piece. Btw, I received your request, and have popped in. If you read my page you would know I don't generally accept friend requests without first establishing some reading and reviewing and mutual banter.

[unspokenpain]

thank I will look into that poem and read it for myself. I did see that you don't accept requests at the moment. I gave it a shot thinking maybe you at least checked. I hope you enjoy my writing.

[npfd]

very nice, enjoy it, reminds me of when people are hard to each.

[Jim_F]

I love how delicately you worked the words together to make such a beautiful piece. Your poem intrigued my curiosity and made me want to eagerly continue until the ending. Thank You for sharing!

[unspokenpain]

Your very welcome lol

[Veronica Staehle]

I like the storyline of this, and the bravery that builds.

[unspokenpain]

Thank you.

[Matching Socks]

Reminds me of the anguish in Adele's song "hello"

[unspokenpain]

Beautiful song. I'm taking that as an amazing compliment. :) thank you

[hcarson]

we all have that inner person, scarred from various 'occurrances' over the course of a life time, each one adding a neww scar, pushing a small part of us further into darkness..untill we..as you say..go visit that injured side of ourselves and maybe give it a bit of help..a bit of understanding about hows/whys etc. very good work we can all relate to. well done :)

[unspokenpain]

Thank you. This was inspired by that thought of our inner selves we keep hidden behind a locked door, the side that's wounded. The side that we keep talking and going back to. Until we open ourselves and receive help it will continue to suffer.

[A.E Dvir]

Wow. Just like, the way you describe this, this hidden personality, that we all have inside, is really good. You managed to really put in to words the feeling you get when you have to acknowledge this "other you" and to try and overcome the fear of reconciling the two parts of who you are

[unspokenpain]

Thank you! I know you how you feel and I'm so happy so many love my writing!

[Inject Positivity]

Sounds like I'm revealing my own self, this is such a good write and gave a lovely thought to the reader to think about... Repeatation of the lines makes it very catchy... It's like I'm meeting my self which is hidden inside me... Many of us don't meet it and even forgot about it in the modern world and society.... Well done....

[unspokenpain]

Thank you. This is my most recent poem and I'm glad you liked it! That's the feeling I have too and actually that's the same thought I had writing this! I'm happy I portrayed my thoughts correctly.

[Inject Positivity]

Well you did my frnd... And I believe that's the most beautiful part of being a writer...

[unspokenpain]

It most certainly is!

[Robert Parlange]

Very good. I liked the repetition and you seem to understand the poetic form.
I don't know if it's a typo, but “I walk through door,” should be “I walk through the door,”.
If I'm wrong, I apologize.

[unspokenpain]

thank you so much! I did not see that typo. The is one of the words are mind tend to place when missing so people tend to miss it. I reread my stuff and I did not see that.

[Robert Parlange]

Sometimes I read it out loud or have the computer read it for me. It helps.

[unspokenpain]

I know what you mean. While I'm writing my current book I will read aloud my chapters over and over again and change errors or sentences that sound weird.

[wordman]

a touch of reality with sad tones,but you can tell it all !
when you don`t feel threatened

[unspokenpain]

thank you for the feedback !