Mom?!

It was really easy for me to find her. First of all, she was in the same alley we met. Second, the alley reeked of wet dog.

“Anna! come on, we don’t have much time. Lets go.”

“What?! Isaac, are you crazy? Leave. I told you I would find you, you’ll lead them all to me and they’ll kill us!”

“Stop Anna, I’ll explain on the way”

“Fine, but we’re leaving my way.”

Next thing I know, were in the sewers. Anna turned to see me every 2 minutes and laughed. My nose had a clothespin I stole from an old lady’s laundry. Even though my nose was clamped shut, the strong smell of the sewers sneaked in. It was disgusting, but I guess I was living the good life.

            “We’re here” said Anna, climbing a ladder that opened through a street. We entered the warehouse. It was already 4:00pm. We looked at each other, trying to figure out what to do next.

            “So… what now?” I asked, looking around the room.

“I don’t know, you told everyone to be here” Anna said, looking at me doubtedly, “didn’t you?...”. We were standing in an empty warehouse, big enough for 50 people. I looked around one more time,

“Umm, I told everyone to meet me at the warehouse… the Garrison Warehouse.” I winced. Anna stared at me. Her glare was pure anger and resentment.

“Clack, clack, clack”

“ Stop Isaac, or I’ll crack something other than your knuckles.” She said with a serious face, “Let’s go.”.

The Garrison Warehouse was at least a mile away, and we were both sick of the sewer smell. If we wanted to get there in time, it had to be through the street, and if didn’t want to get any attention, we had to fit in.

“Anna, what size of pants are you?”

“6, why?” I searched my duffle bag. My sister had tons of extra uniforms, I really don’t know why, but they do come in handy. I took a pair of khakis out that seemed to be Anna’s size, and a blue polo shirt.

“Here, put it on”

    “NO. No way, khakis are not my thing. My jeans are fine.” I rolled my eyes, just like Anna.

       “We have to get out of here, or we’ll be late. Besides, your jeans aren’t exactly our new fashion trend. One glare at you and we’ll be surrounded by officials” She scrunched her face, feeling defeated

“FINE.” I, on the other hand, felt glorious and invincible. The power was tingling my fingers, and Anna’s face was priceless.

“Are you smirking?!” She asked. Immediately, the power left. Anna again made me want to crack my knuckles.

“No!” I answered, losing the smirk that invaded my face without me noticing it.

The streets were quiet, and the cold made our arm hairs prickle.

“Where is everyone?” asked Anna, surely I had no clue.

“I don’t know, but I’m sure it’s not good” We walked with caution, not knowing what this all meant. I certainly felt fear rising through my body, and I’m sure Anna too.

“We have to make a quick stop. I need the news report and my dog. We need proof.”

            “Okay, this way” We walked past the nasty restaurant I saw on my birthday, and we entered the alley. It was cold, not even the rats dared to come out. Anna reached the video, and called for her dog, he appeared in less than a second. I still wasn’t comfortable with the dog. He was big, and its fur was clean, too clean for me to know that it wasn’t always in Asheville. Filth was everywhere, but not in the dog. It was beautiful, and I felt an urge to pet it.

“Go ahead, his name is Aaron. He can be mean if he needs to, but not know. He likes you.” I reached down for Aaron, he met my extended hand and wiggled his tail.

“He’s amazing.”

“He truly is, he was my only company before I met you. It was me and him against the world” I smiled. She made me believe that I too could have a dog someday.

“Is he the last one?”

“I don’t think so. He’s been the only one I’ve seen, but other nomads have told me that they are all hidden, like me. I believe that if our plan works, we could all come out from hiding.”

            Pictures from magazines filled my head. Laughing children, happy families at a park, playing and running.

“We should get going Isaac, if I was invited to a party and no one appeared after 1 hour I would leave, right before eating some food of course” We started walking out. After crossing 4 streets, I could see the warehouse at a distance. It was the same size as the other one, and surely, Emma was outside waiting for us.

“That’s Emma” I told Anna, pointing at Emma, who smiled and waved when she saw us, “she’s 15, and very eager to meet you” Anna had a sparkle in her eyes when I turned to see her.

“I’ve never met another girl before. I always dreamed of being invited to a sleepover and having a group of friends” I assured her that Emma was really fun to be around, and just when we were 2 corners away from the warehouse, my mom’s voice pierced through our ears.

Reviews

[David Jae]

I like what you've done with this.

You tell the story well, using dialogue and the characters reactions to bring the reader in, rather than just telling what happens. You still use a little exposition in places.
E.G.
"She called for her dog, he appeared in less than a second."
It might be better this way;
"She called for her dog and I heard the soft pad of his paws as he emerged from the alley."
Descriptive words can paint a picture and change the scene.

"E.G.
"She called for her dog and I heard the rough scrape of his paws as he emerged from the alley."
Or
"She called for her and I heard the fast pad of his paws as he emerged from the alley."

Food for thought, but you have a strong style.

Keep at it.

[unspoken_vocabulary]

Thanks!! :D

[David Jae]

You're welcome