Come Out And Dream

A Spoken Word piece I did about my life and views of it.

It's another quiet night, just a quiet anything 

but a dream 

night.

Dreams for me are like falling when dancing, 

motionless

and

not light as a feather, more like stiff as a board.

Children's games, 

like Chutes and Ladders.

But I'm no feather and I don't see wings. 

Isn't that what flies?

even if I could in my dreams there's no skies.

I wake finding it's still a dream.

So I think dream big,

But I'm no giant, even if I was I can't say what kind I'd be.

Maybe a gentle one,

maybe a thunderous one living atop a bean stalk in the clouds.

But I don't like to think about clouds and birds that fly,

Cause after all in my dreams there's no sky.

No sky...

Dreams like this are good for contemplating why.

I could detach my head and look inside, but what could I find?

What is it I think I'd hide?

More children's games, 

Hide and Go Seek.

It'not fun when no one counts except you 

and

it's not fun when you're the only one that hides.

Time to go home it's getting dark,

but oh yeah, there's no sky

My dreams are fragile things.

So I show great care.

not to break them,

not to hate them,

and not to think to hard when I see no sky.

But I think, 

I think maybe I'm a little depressed.

Maybe I'm repressed,

It may be I think too much.

And then again maybe not enough of myself.

There's still no sky when I dream, no clouds.

I still walk, I won't run.

What if I fell into that absence in the air above.

Absence like an abyss of thoughts I might reminisce.

Don't reach too high, there's no sky.

I won't jump, no one wants to hear me scream, 

I might even cry.

After all my dreams have no sky...

They say if you don't dream you're dead inside.

They say dreams are a doorway to the soul.

My dreams are a locked door and my key slid itself under,

yes slid itself; why would I lie.

Because I thought if I lie there long enough I could reach my key.

But opening that door holds nothing for me.

After all what would there be?

A Pandora's Box of quiet things or perhaps echoing misery.

I'm not sure, but I tend to think,

it won't be a sky.

No sky, no just a parade of alibis I tried to live by.

A spinning sound that rings in my ears with the force a hammer pounds.

More children's games like,

playing on the Merry Go Round 

and

Ashes to ashes we all fall down.

Maybe I'm just a little too down, 

maybe I get on myself that way too much.

Maybe.

There's still no skies, 

I think it relates to all the times my mom cried.

Me.

This cause and effect, my dreams a movie they won't let me direct.

Direction I often lacked, I'm sorry she cried...

I just pretended to leave and that was all,

I wasn't going to get very far though,

My heart's a wall.

A wall I won't stand on top of,

bricks leading to emptiness.

There's no sky up there, I so easily scare

and

this is a dream so I don't dare, but I do care.

I care that I should be able to dream a little more,

should be able to think a little less.

I shouldn't be such a mess.

These children's games I can't play, they won't let me play.

I won't let myself today, probably not tomorrow either.

Happy or sad?

In truth I am neither.

I make my dreams and there is no sky.

Children's toys like G.I. Joe and Cobra commander.

Playdough,

I can't build anything but I'll play though.

But they won't let me, those dreams with no skies.

Those dreams so unfair.

It's not the dreams I won't share,

It's that

I'm truly...

my nightmare...

Author's Note

Thoughts, opinions, and critique please.
I will eventually be attaching the actual spoken word version.

Reviews

[.]

Wow, I write such poems sometimes,... I loved it though,
Thanks for the submission! Good Luck :)

[Jordan Adkins]

This is making me want to cry. Such passion and emotion. I'm in love with this. Great job.

[Gianna Dale]

Wow...
I've never related or emoted to a piece quite like this. This is very near perfection to me. I can't understand how you stated the truth so eloquently, without fudging you made this breath-taking. I'm still dizzied by this, as dramatic as that sounds. Still pondering. And I will bet I'm going to continue to do so for the rest of the day, at least. Very well penned. This is one of the highest ratings I've ever given anybody. I relate so deeply- well done, well done.

[unsavable_soul]

Thank you Gianna,
I am glad it spoke to someone as much as it spoke from me. I think it comes short of much of the beautiful words you give me here, but I am so pleased that you found this to be personal as well.
Sincerely
Christopher

[Gianna Dale]

Absolutely.
Always,
Gianna

[Robbie~xoxo~]

So sad... "Fragile"....
Each line supporting the next...

Great pain is expressed in this piece..you being your own nightmare and not able to take flight in dream skies, leaves me to ponder on the psychological aspect of childhood...

Nicely penned! :

[unsavable_soul]

Thank you Robbie,
I went for straight from the heart and off the cuff, if you will. I really have come to love this piece, but also greatly fear attempting recording it. I am tripping daisies over this one, but tripping over myself as well. It means a lot to me that you appreciate this.
Sincerely
Christopher

[Robbie~xoxo~]

Always go straight from the heart... it's the best way of connecting...
keep writing... :)

[Jessica Gillitzer]

I think this is perfection, i can't wait to hear the spoken word version on here. i feel haunted by your skyless dreams, they are all our nightmares in some way. i found the kids games to be very strong, i thought like a child there for was a child. great stuff.
Jessie

[unsavable_soul]

Well you may have to,
I am getting all apprehensive about actually recording it. I did a run through a couple of times. I just kept tripping up. I am worried I am too self conscious.
Wish me luck and thanks for the support.
Sincerely
Christopher

[Jessica Gillitzer]

You can do it, just relax a bit. easier said than done but, do it. lol.
I want it and I won't take no for an answer.
Jessie

[unsavable_soul]

I'll see what I can give you tonight maybe.
Chris

[Jessica Gillitzer]

Hehehe. N/M lol.
< 3 Jessie

[Rita L. Sev]

I get a feeling of a lost childhood, trying to get it back without success. Now, the dreams offer only a "quiet desperation". A provocative, well written piece.

[unsavable_soul]

Very nice,
I allude to a lot within this one piece, in a sense I am not sure what this was more than self expression. The more I look at it the less I can see of one thing and the more I see of everything else. I guess it kind of captures me, as a whole my want for the joy I see in the world but an ever damning personal segregation. Thank you for your insights and supportive words, I due appreciate both greatly.
Sincerely
Christopher

[jacob erin-cilberto]

"my dreams a movie they won't let me direct"

great line...yes, we go through life and sooner or later the children's games won't work...because, yes, we are the only ones counting in hide and seek...and no one really wants to find us.
so we just keep searching for ourselves.

dreaming is good as long we can handle the reality of the waking moments and not lose faith in ourselves.
we can avert the nightmare if we understand.

[unsavable_soul]

Ever insightful,
I am always astonished by how much you say with so little. You offer some serious ideas here. I coming to a point where I shape the dream more than am shaped by the nightmare I refused to stand against. Thank you so much for your support and enlightening thoughts, it is always a pleasure to receive a review by you. Thanks again Jacob.
Gratefully
Christopher

[Jupiter]

This is sincerely touching and moving. I have to say that I feel it is one of the most honest pieces you have ever written. I felt like I was taking a journey with you, with a surprise twist at the end. At the beginning I felt myself being sad and pulled into this dark world. Toward the middle I felt like things were starting to brighten up, I felt hope, especially at these lines, "this is a dream so I don't dare, but I do care. / I care that I should be able to dream a little more" but shortly after that I am let down again by the overall realization that you feel you are your own nightmare. And the point that, "Those dreams so unfair".

I thought a lot about what "dreams with no skies" would mean. Is this a play on the phrase "the sky's the limit"? I thought about that but it didn't fit. If it the sky was truly the limit and your dreams had no sky, they would be limitless. Instead to me the phrase brings darkness. No bright blue skies or starry nights, no beaming sun or comforting moon. Just true darkness. It is very haunting to think about.

The part about you feeling responsible for your Mom crying was a powerful moment for me. That is a deep ache and one that is not easily shook. I know it is easier said that done but try not to look so deeply into those moments. As a Mom I know that the times I cry it is not because of my children but my own issues. I often wonder though if they will feel this way when they get older.

The contrast of children's games and hopelessness was a very unique and thought provoking metaphor. You have these, in essence, dreamless dreams contrasting with the hopefulness and optimism of children's dreams. While they are dreaming about being princesses or pirates you are dreaming about dark moments and emotionless tides.

I hope this piece helped you because while it is hauntingly beautiful, it is too much for one person to feel and you deserve to feel something.

Thank you for sharing,
Jupiter

[unsavable_soul]

Dear Jupiter,
The reference to the sky comes from a poem I read by Shel Silverstein when I was a kid, I can't remember much about it other then this kid falling and floating away. Actually I think it might have been "Falling Up" but I am not sure. I also used to think as a child what it would be like to fly. I think the sky aspect is more just something children think about. Not sure, it just came to me. Thanks for the review, glad you liked it.
Sincerely
Christopher

[Jupiter]

I love Shel Silverstein. I have a lot of his books. I think he was my first exposure to poetry.
read moreI love Shel Silverstein. I have a lot of his books. I think he was my first exposure to poetry.

http://arthamilton.tripod.com/webquest/falling-up.jpg

Jupiter

[minnie:)]

This is a good poem, I loved it:)

[unsavable_soul]

I'm glad you liked this,
I am dragging a bit of butt today, but I will be getting around to your chapter two here very soon. I look forward to it.
Sincerely
Christopher

[minnie:)]

Okay, thanks for letting me know :)

[I.N.Kelly]

So I've read this poem from beginning to end and end to beginning. It's actually quite stunning.
"There's no sky up there, I so easily scare
and
this is a dream so I don't dare, but I do care.
I care that I should be able to dream a little more,
should be able to think a little less.
I shouldn't be such a mess."

I love this verse becasue of the rhythm and what I can see in my minds eye.

"My dreams are fragile things.
So I show great care.
not to break them,
not to hate them,
and not to think to hard when I see no sky.
But I think,
I think maybe I'm a little depressed.
Maybe I'm repressed,
It may be I think too much.
And then again maybe not enough of myself."

I love this verse for a similar reason. This poem is lovely and I really enjoyed it. Thank you for sharing.
Best wishes
~kelly

[unsavable_soul]

Thanks Kelly.
I don't know when but I want to get this together as a full recorded spoken piece. I am glad you enjoyed this.
Sincerely
Christopher