All A Dream

If this is all a dream
And death is my wake up call
Then these pills sure are doing their job
Of lifting me out of my sleepy surrender

Wake me up so I can finally be free
Of the constant worry and unending disbelief
Because I'm not who I was anymore
I am an untamable monster
There is no trace of the girl you once knew
She is a trick, a mirage for your thirsting eyes
You wish she existed so you could have
What once was there
But she died along with the happiness
That rested somewhere in my mutilated body
She has been replaced by raging
Self-hating machine
In her place is an orb of twisting doubt
And you don't want anything to do with it
And I don't blame you

And when I wake up, I will be myself again
And you will love me the way I love you

Author's Note

i need to keep up to date with this site, i have a lot of poems to upload