My heart beats for you,
Who am I to tell it not?
Love conquers all fear.
The wind rustled the dark trees outside my window, causing shadows to dance on my ceiling, taunting my every moments, making sleep insurmountable... Yet, when I attempt to close my eyes and drift to sleep, all that my thoughts turned to was that night... That night I first met him who owned my heart.
That night is like a dream to me, something that can never reach to reality, just a figment of my wishes and desires... He came out in a cloud of smoke, on the foggiest of nights... I was alone, lost in the woods, never to return to the day of light. My soul was vanquish, my hope demised. He appeared in front of me, 7 feet tall, his features and shape hidden in shadow... He moved down close to me, his face inches away from mine.
“Little boy...you are far from home...” he whispered softly to me, thought a mouth that I could not see.. He had no absolute features present on his face, Yet I felt no fear towards him. All I wished of him was to rescue me from my abandonment.. It was cold... And lonesome...
I saw shades of darkness come towards me in the parted moonlight, hidden behind the trees. The warm arms wrapped around me, lifting me up from my previous grave. In these arms I felt safe and warm, the skies parting to release their tears upon us...
Yet, I was dry, the tears of the sky missing my body... It was of the tall man. He used things of the earth to deflect the wetness from above... The tall man tilted his head towards me, looking at my face with his non-apparent eyes..
“Little boy..Where is it that you lay your head at?” He stopped his stride whilst we were protected under a tree. The rain continued to pour, Falling from the sky with a grateful breather of all of the thirsty plants.
“M-my kind sir, the place of where I lay my head at has vanquish in a mighty blaze... I am without the comforts of the living, left with the coldness of the earth.” I was very shy as I spoke this.. I was unsure of what he would think that I was stationed in his home of the forest.
“That is not a proper place for a gentleman of your such class.... “ He removed the jacket of the suit he was wearing, covering it over me. To protect me from the chilly air. The area around me was dull in the sudden down pour, plus the moon shining through every small cracks... The tall man had on such a red tie, that it made everything else feel warmer...
The forest started to pass by us at a quick pace, everything fading into deeper darkness, until the moon could no longer shine through the brush. All I could view in this such deep darkness was the red of his tie.
“K-Kind sir.. I am rather frightened.. of such darkness..” I tightened my grip onto the jacket, that I felt was my shield from the horrors awaiting at this time.
“I will protect you to my end, no one will harm you..” I felt his lips gently on my forehead.. It felt me with absolute warmth and happiness. My heart felt like it was melting with how much it filled me.... I trusted this tall stranger with my life.. My heart rate was irregular, what was happening to me?
“Thank you....sir..” I manage to mummer out, closing my eyes.. The warmth made me realize just how exhausted I truly as, from many days with no rest. I soon faded into a peaceful, dreamless sleep.. His red tie the last thing in my image...
I awakened in a home of safety and peace, with a relative that I had not know of their existence. They called themselves ‘Auntie June’. It was the work of the tall man, I asked no questions. He promised to protect me, he would not leave me to the wolves.
Years later I still do stay with this woman. She made sure I have the proper education that was needed for a future as a mature gentleman in this current society. I got the proper clothing and attention to raise a healthy adult..
Yet, he was always on my mind. The tall man. My memories are all foggy, but that was so vivid. His bright red tie the last thing I see of him... I craved to just see him, one more time.
It was too strong. My feeling to find him. I had to go back.. to see, if he would come.. I left the safety of my bed, left the dancing of shadows on my ceiling and in my dreams, leaving to find him, my tall man... My savior...
The night was misty as before, the moon shining ever so slightly through the brush of the trees, leading my pathway through the darkness... I felt I had an understanding of where I would be headed, to walk completely straight in a line... But from fallen trees, I had to change my pathway from straight...
I was soon lost. I started to panic, losing my breath, tears to my eyes... Before i was okay to die with the earth, in the darkness of the forest.. But I wanted to see him one more time, I needed to, to die happily.. I felt the desperateness rushing through my blood, causing my body to work harder and harder..
My knees buckled from under me, causing me to fall in the moist ground. The clothes i had on once protected me from the chilly air. Now, it was making the air feel twice as cold, chilling me to the bone.
I couldn’t die... Not until I got to see him once more... If I could see him... just... for 1 more minute... I could die happily.... I know god is a vengeful god, I disobeyed my orders to stay in bed and slumber till the break of dawn. I left the safety of the bed for something that could be a figment of my imagination... Now I would pay the price of my foolishness.
The slight light from the moon started to fade away, my only light to fade away.. I managed to crawl myself carefully to a tree where I would have slight protection from the elements upon me.... Myself in a ball, I managed to keep my inner warmth alive, for a slightly bit longer.... Soon it faded, along with my conciousness....
I was in and out of my life. When I was awake for those few precious seconds, I realized I was being carried... And, I saw a bright red tie.. He did come, oh how I rejoiced from that time.. Yet, as soon as I saw it the darkness crept over me once more...
I awakened once again, god releasing his grasps of death on me. I was on the lounge in the foyer, my clothes caked in the mud of the earth, yet one thing upon me was clean. A red tie.
I quickly put it away into my undergarments just as my Aunt made her walk down the stairs.
“Alexander Lee Pemberton, What have you done to yourself? I exclaimed to you the next time I find that you have disobeyed my rules, We would move inward to the hometown, did I not? Now you force me. Clean up and pack your possessions, we are moving.” She said, her head held high as she walked out of the room, To the kitchen. We shared this grand house with my elderly grandparents and my other family member who called himself uncle Benny.
I sat there, awestruck. From disobeying the simple rule of staying in my bed until dawn, we are leaving the sanctuary of this green land. The beauty of the stars at night, the beauty of how the grass shines in ripples from the wind and sunshine...
All of it. The forest where the mysterious tall man resided... Gone. Only the yelling of my aunt put a pep in my step, finding me off guard that made me run upward the stairs and to the bathroom.
My clothes were a mess, i had to pry them off of my body, holding tight to me as a dried suit... The red tie, though in my undergarments, was still very clean... I hung it up on the mirror as I started the bath, I needed to cleanse myself well..
I wished that we could leave of the morrow, then one more night I could leave to try and find him... Awake this time.. Yet, my aunt knew of my plans from the previous night, she seemed to know that I would repeat it..
Every Time I looked at the tie, my heart fluttered in my chest. The entire bath that I had consisted of staring at the tie, picturing the tall man in my head again and again.. Then, scrubbing the dirt caked on my skin with a damp wash cloth. The sun shined outside of my window, just to torment me. I love the darkness of night, it was when I first saw him... The darkness of night that shields my insecurities like a blanket, the moon, the only light to shine my pathway.. The time, were a single red tie can make warmth spread throughout my body....
I closed my eyes and laid back, head on the edge of my bath, picturing his arms around me.. His lips to my forehead..... When he made sure I returned to my dwelling safely.... It made my simple country life seem astonishing...
It made my heart flutter beyond belief... I felt the deepest love for this tall man.. I knew not of what he did, or who he was... He saved me from absolute perish.. Promise to protect me and keep me warm... Now I was leaving him..
All chances of setting eyes upon him in light, so i could recognize his memorable face.. vanished by the simple words; ‘moving.’
My bath ended in a shatter of my dreams, the yelling of my aunt to commence packing, end my warm, safe bath... Of course, I listened to her. I was only 13 years of age, no where near manhood. I had not reached my time of development either. I still had the lightest brown hair of my family, dulling down from the blonde of my childhood. My height nearing just 5’2, nothing of the men of my family.
I was just 8 years of age when the blaze took my parental figures, my siblings, I only to escape. My elder brother had 3 heads and 6 years upon mine. My father was a gracious being, he was tall, much taller than I assume he actually was to the shorter me, With his dark locks.. My mother, on the other hand, was a symbol of beauty and charm. Her smile would shine through even the cloudiest of days for my father, She had the blondest hair, similar to the sun.
My little brother, I had 3 years above him, looked just like my mom. I tried to get him out in the confusion of the fire, since all three of us siblings shared an area, yet I have no knowledge if he did escape with his life... All I know of was my brother and parentals had vanquished with the bones of the house..
I made sure to have all of my possessions with me before I returned to my current room... It was nothing special, at least in appearance. The special thing to me was it looked out onto the forest. In the shine of the morn it looked not threatful. Though, at the darkness of the night, it appeared to be sinister. The shadows seem evil that danced upon my ceiling, creating shapes of monsters willing and waiting to digest me, haunting my every slumber.
I retrieved the bags left for me to place my belongings into. I don’t believe in the safety of our transportation with this suitcase, everything dear to me going on my body. A locket I received when I reached the age of 8, with a picture of the family on it. My day of birth celebration was nearing the eve of the blaze, like my mother predicted the outcome of it.. I forever have this as a memory now.
I wore basic clothing of my time, slacks that reached my ankles, a button-up shirt that was under a wool jacket, with two rows of silver buttons. yet, it got hot, I was of a ‘classic upbrings’ i had to drew accordingly. My family had little money before, making ends meet with luck. It raised me to appreciate all of the possessions you receive.
This family, on the other hand, does not appreciate the glories of having ends meet always met, with pocket money too. It seems that the grandfather on that side, who favored his daughter, not his son (my father), Was a traveling businessman, and made quite a lot from it, producing the items for sell without going door-to-door. They always received everything that they needed or desired. They were spoiled.
I put on the tie under my dress shirt, to try and hide any bulge lines from appearing to the public. The rest of the clothing and toiletries that I possessed went into my one suitcase. It was a tight fit, yet it did fit. It was rather heavy though.
My aunt was yelling to someone about nonsense that I wished to not here. she was a very sociable woman. Why she wanted to move to the city, no doubt.
When I arrived down to the foyer, my aunt was there, with several bags she used to store her clothing. It seemed rather unneeded and not very safe, a horse-drawn carriage can easily get too heavy for the horse.
Yet, it seemed okay. The driver boarded the suitcases, then my aunt, and then me. With one yell of his strong voice, ‘Yeah!’, the horses gathered their speed, pulling us along with them. I closed my eyes.. wishing one more farewell.. To the tall man...
______________________________________________________________________
It took months for me to feel even slightly comfortable here. But I got into a pleasant routine. Breakfast. Chores until mid morning, then lunch. After that, my teacher comes in. I have lessons until nightfall. Then more chores, Dinner, bathing, homework, then to repeat it all over again. Not a very...... exciting life. But it was what I had to do. I did all of the housely chores, my aunt practically abandoning until the wee hours of the morning, where she would come back with a gentleman friend, reeking of booze. She would leave immediately after breakfast too, if she ate it. She was getting rather thin, too sick in morning to be able to stomach food.
I did not care for her very much, yet I respected her to the best of my capability. my teacher was a wonderful break. He was a man in his 20’s, well studied, a rather sheltered man. He was from rich descent, the reason my aunt picked him to be my learner. He was more like an associate who gave study work, then my teacher. We would talk about normal things, like friends even. He would stay for dinner, as part of his reduced pay, and that would sometimes be slightly..
Uncomfortable.
He looked at me in a different way that I don’t believe teachers are suppose to look at their students like. It made me feel like he was picturing me without my formal coat on, and that was a large assumption. I’d be like the farm folk without it, half nude with bodily fluid stains, dirt stains, unimaginable things that those see! I dislike dirt of any form and way. Why I worked hard to keep this house spotless.
I had time after my homework was done to relax and think.. I slept with the red tie under my pillow, peering at it every time I felt despair with my life. I knew, that somewhere, he would protect me. If not physically, mentally. He promised to...
Not one day passed in which I didn’t think about the tall man and that night... Those nights... I would be sweeping the dust from the floor, then suddenly break down in tears... Because I knew.. he was gone... There was no way for me to see him again.. I would run to my room, get the tie, and wear it around the house. It made my day... Always so much more happy.
The current day I was not feeling the best. Finished all chores with time to spare, so I thought to get the tie and relax in bed. My tie either being on me or under my pillow, I was in shock when it was no longer there. I searched high and low, every nook and cranny of every square inch of that house....It was gone. I hope whilst I was not there for a short time, one of my "uncles" sleeping with my aunt for the night did not walk in, see the tie, my tie, and decided he needed one! I was disgusted the remanding of the day.
I did not consume dinner, I just sat there and watched my teacher consume the food i had to make.... My one comfort of the world, God couldn’t even let me have it. I know I should not be so smiteful on the all powerful God, He created and lead me through the blaze to stay alive... Yet for one reason? I was miserable, The comfort of this rich and easy life... Bored me. I liked it more when I could live life challenging, a small house with big charm and close family...
I had done something terrible. The morrow after the disappearance of the tall man’s possession, I accused my aunt at a voice level above respect. I gave it two days to magically appear up before I approached her over the morning mean.
“Auntie, the locket that I received on the celebration of my 8th year live has gone missing. I did re-clean and re-search everything in the property. I believe one of your gentlemen have taken it.” I said, it rather harsh, making it like I was blaming her for their behaviors. I had to say my locket, if I said my tie she would question where I possessed it out with the little pocket money I was allowed, for groceries, and claim that I took it without permission.
She got rather defensive. “What kind of people do you think I bring in here?! All of the ‘gentlemen’ that I bring into this house are all of my close relations for-for months before I do that with them! i am not a common hussy on the corner, Alexander Lee Pemberton, and for assuming that you can go to your room without breakfast and stay there until your teacher arrives!” She was rather fluffed about this.... Yet, she had different men here every night..
I laughed at her punishment. If I were to stay in my room, she would not be ready in the morning at all, I layed out her clothing, made her bed, scrubbed the lavatory after she releases her stomach contents onto the floor from consuming too much alcohol.
I still had to do the dishes, I could not leave them to dry and fester in the sink for hours upon end. She left long before I was gone. Yet I heard a noise. It sounded like the window from my room slid open. I had good ears of every bone in this house. Every creak, every window, door, everything. What i get from hardly leaving for countless months...
I approached the door to my room... I heard someone step on the creak that was 5 my steps away.. Someone was inside of my room... I had to defend the house, It has all of my aunt’s most cherishable possessions in it! I put my hand on the door handle, turning it slowly, expecting rather my ending doom from the intruder, or a fight. I was ready, I would do my best.
I opened the door in a sudden burst, stepping in quickly, ready for a brawl. Except from the sudden pressure I had on the door handle from the jitters I had of the intruder, my balance faulted. I fell down, flat on my face, my hands useless to catch me. I felt pain in my nose, blood leaking out onto the floor.. I attempted to pick myself up, first with my knees, causing my butt to be in the air...
The floor creaked towards me. I forgot about the intruder in my sudden heroic actions. I held my breath, afraid to move. I was in an open position to be bounded, grabbed, killed, anything.
I felt a hand go onto my behind and gently onto the small of my back, rubbing it lightly before they levitated me to my feet, allowed me my space for letting those parts go. The intruder stood straight in front of me, yet it wasn’t an intruder.
I was looking right into the pale white face of the tall man. The blood was running down my nose quickly, yet I hardly noticed it. My face filled with blood, causing my cheeks to be rosy. He was here... Right here... Right in front of me.. His hand moved up with a handkerchief, a bright red one. He gently dabbed my nose with it, then gave me the handkerchief. His face looked like a bare skull covered with flesh. He had a mouth that was closed, a prominent strong chin, the shape of a nose.. his eyes were bare though,covered in the white flesh...
Yet.. I was not afraid. I was even comforted from him here.. I felt like the fall caused me to hallucinate, or I had passed out.. He was in the forest.. Why would he follow me to this lowly, unnatural place?
“w-why...?” I asked softly, yet his finger went gently to my lips. My heart was pounding in my ears, threatening to fall out of every opening.. He was here.. touching my lips.. In front of me, in this place i believed would be my early grave..
“shh..” His hands moved to around his neck, taking the tie that he had off of his persons, then placing it on me, his head not moving form near me... He straightening out the back.. his hand trailing down my spine, from my neck to my lower back... He backed up immediately after that, to the window.
“w-wait..” I said, breathless form such contact. I wanted him to stay, I wanted to talk to him, I.. Just wanted him...
He went to the open window, giving me one last look before he went through it.. I was paralyzed, I couldn’t move.. His touch was tingling my spine, my heart beating so hard.. I finally got out of that bliss to walk to the window..
He was gone. If it wasn’t for the handkerchief and the tie.. I would have assumed it was all but a taunting dream.. I managed to fall into my bed, closing my eyes.. The tie and handkerchief smelled like him.... It smelled like... A fresh rainfall.... Newly blossomed flowers..
I missed all of these... The rest of my time being pushed I spent with the handkerchief to my nose.. The blood soon then slowed, then stopped.. Though I felt it move to somewhere else.. the blood moved down into my prickle. It raised itself up, becoming fully erected.. From just the gently touch of the tall man..
The feelings.. I felt for him did not extend to just emotional.... He was the only one I pictured in my head.. I started to experiment with what felt better to me... I pictured it was slenderman’s big strong hands doing this to me, making me feel so better.. It was the first time I ever experimented with my prickle....
All of these different feelings escalated quickly, reaching me to be in a weird sort of pleasure I never experienced before... I felt my body tensing, my breath shallowing, my heart racing faster... I stopped quickly as my door opened, In came walking my teacher.
“Alexander, we have alot to cover...Today...So... Get.... “ he said, before he closed the door slowly, dropped his books and materials onto the ground, and paced himself over to me, slowly..
I must have looked a mess... There was no covers to hide myself with, yet I would not foil the cleanliness of the tall man’s tie, nor handkerchief. I sat there with my prickle in my hand, my breath still staggered, sweat drops rolling down my face.
“Alexander... What you are doing is a very evil thing.... To do alone...” He said, placing his hand over mine, removing it from my prickle. I had no choice but to move it, I was in a daze that i could not easily escape.. The end goal was near, yet i knew not of what it would bring... His hand started to rub the very end of it, with his palm on the tip, his fingers on the more upper part.. That made me feel very sensitive here.. Yet.. I wanted him to stop.. I didn’t want him to do this... I wanted my Tall man..
But to my displeasure, no rescue came. He continued rubbing that until i was bent over, unable to breath, the pleasure getting unbearable... Until a clearish whitish cream came out of the tip... In this time of weakness, just as it came out, causing quite a mess that i would need to clean, my teacher leaned over, locking his lips against mine.
I did nothing back. I just let him do it, unable to fight. Especially to my elder, It was extremely rude... My mind did not react kindly to it though. My mind wanted me to push him away, tell him that my tall man was the only one to do this, not him! Yet, that would cause him to find intelligences about my tall man....
That would be worse than anything he could do to me. He ceased hold of my prickle, His face beaming with his enjoyment. “mm...I have to teach you... About sex..” He said softly giving me a towel from the other side of the room to clean up with.
I did it with hace, trying to clean up quickly as I humanly could, So that my prickle can be put away. His observant of it made me even more uncomfortable... I got it away before he could have his enjoyment of it. I stood tall, trying to hide my absolute embarrassment. He caught me. But, he did not catch my tall man..
“What you did is okay, it isn’t evil... as long as you let your teacher help you learn more about it..” He stood right behind me, His arms around my neck, his words whispered in my ear, causing my heart to beat fast.. Not the same as of what the tall man does.. More like... reluctance.
I felt his tongue move from the bottom of my neck up to my ear, causing a shiver to go down my body.. It was really uncomfortable, His body pushed tight against the back of mine... I put my hand on his, using my strength and every bit of love that I had for the tall man to be able to do what I did... I told him no.
“No. Teacher, I do not wish to study such of this today.” I said, getting away from him so I was facing him. His face was flushed, full of blood like mine when the Tall Man is there. He stared at me in bewilderment, rubbing his cheek with the palm of his hand.
“You..stood up for yourself.. Though I am required to teach you more about what you did... Today I will suspense that lesson. Now, Get your books and writing utensils, then meet me in the foyer, in our normal spot.” He said, excusing himself from the room.
When he was out, I hid the tie and the handkerchief. I wanted them to be safe, yet he did witness them... I am praying that he does not bring up what it is. Young gentleman of my age do not normally have ties, especially on their persons in their own private work. I collected myself and my equipment before making my way out to the requested spot.
He sat there, the end of his glasses in his mouth, chewing on it very slightly. He looked at me, his head crooked to the side.
“Come here, Alexander. I have a few questions to ask of you.” He sat back in his chair, in a way that would be rude if it was before a lady. I reluctantly paced my way there, setting down my possessions onto the table, taking my seat adjacent of him. He leaned forward, examining all about my poster.
“What had caused you to become excited like that?” He asked, His arms crossing on his chest. He had a relaxed yet stressed way he sat and observed me. I felt he had a feeling already on what it was.
“Nothing, teacher sir.” I was being such a brat now, lying, resisting my teacher, demanding answers from the lady of the house, My aunt.. If i didn’t know better, I was becoming of age of a man, behaving so... Terribly, offensively.
“Oh, I know what you had experienced. That red tie is not yours, Young men of your age do not own ties, especially red ones. Who was the gentleman inside of your room?” He asked, flat out, staring at me. It caught me off guard though I thought I was prepared for this. He knew i had a gentleman.. The tall man.. inside of my room.
“Oh, teacher sir, I do not understand what you mean. I have been in my room, under the punishment of my aunt all of the morn’.” I tried to give him the most innocent face that I possibly could.
“so you were punished by your Aunt? For what, pray tell?”
“I had spoke out of turn towards her. I was to my room without my morning meal, and to stay there until the arrival of you.” I tried to give him the most truthful face towards him for everything I said. With the information that I had spoke out of turn, he could be suspicious of my honesty already.
“Who did you receive that red tie from?” He directly asked, looking at my eyes. I was weak to that, I was always unable to look people in their eyes when I deceived them.
“I got it... From... A man.” I told the truth. He knew I did too, from the smirk that appeared across his face.
“That is all of the information that I need.... for now. Since you are under punishment, I will leave you with your assignment.” He said, handing me a book with pages marked with bits of paper.
“Do all of these, I will expect it tomorrow. adieu.” He raised, gathered his things, and parted my presence... It was the sweetest sound I could ever have prayed for.. the sound of nothing....
Within days to follow, my teacher did not bring up the tie anymore. He just continued like it always had been, life moved on... Everyday I awaited a chance for the tall man to arrive in my room... Wisk me away off my feet.. Take me away to his home, to keep me there forever... In peace and love...
Everytime I pictured him in my head my heart would uncontrollably beat very fast, not stop until I was able to either release that pressure out through my prickle, (Never before the Teacher arrived, Normally before the time I rested) or I would have to just breathe... Breathe his scent in and out, until my nerves would vanish away.. His tie, the smell had vanished all too soon.... I had the new one now...
I started to feel fear though. I left my house the once a week to get groceries to feed myself. While I was waiting in the large line at the market, I overheard two older men talking.
“Yeah, I been hearin’ more and more about the homosexuals be comin’ out all over the place! they makes me sick! If I evers be seein’ one, I bring my gun.” The older man (Not a gentleman) Exclaimed loudly to his friend behind him before he spat his tobacco out onto the floor.
“I be agreeing, if one lived in my neighborhood, they won’t be there for long.” They both shared a laugh, the man in front of them laughing also.
“That IS the best thing to do, it’s like a disease! I’ll give away my baby if he ends up like that.” A very pregnant woman said, rubbing her extended belly. What I was hearing dumbfounded me... And frightened me extremely.
If anyone knew of what happened..and my true feelings.. I-I would be hurt.. killed... My aunt’s house be burnt down to the ground, because of a leaked word... Or a peep through the window...
The rest of my day I spent with the blinds closed... Especially when the teacher came to teach me more about sexual relations...
“Our lesson today does not have books. Today is a physical and speech lesson. Now, it will take place in your room.” He walked me to my room, forcefully almost. I did not want to learn that way. It made me anything from comfortable. His hand was on my back, leading me to the room like i was his lamb..
He was the big, bad, wolf, I was the innocent lamb stuck under his big, sharp, claws. He sat me down onto the bed, positing me with my legs spread open towards the end, whilst he sat there with himself in between them.
He grinned at me, moving himself over me so his face was to mine, his body pushed against my sensitive area’s.
“Now, Alexander, tell me.... What that man did to you.. The man with the red tie..” he whispered, his lips to mine, gently touching them. I tried to move away father, keep away from him as much as I could, but he was there the most.... He moved his lips to my ear, kissing my ear then down to my neck.
“H-He did nothing.....He did nothing to me...” I didn’t want to tell him that he had touched me.. It was an accident, of course... Or, he was doing it to help me, right? The tall man... wouldn’t want little, small me.. right?
“What did you want him to do..?” He breathed in my ear, before he started to graze his lips gently against mine. I closed my eyes.. I pictured him in my mind... Stronger than ever before, I pictured the tall man with me here... To take him off of me...
His hand found the under part of my body, as he started to rub it.. He rubbed my behind, everything in that area. It made me pictured the tall man even more.. Only he could do it... Only the Tall man could touch me...
“No... Stop.. Only he can touch me, no.....!” I called out loudly as his other hand was caressing my lower stomach.. He laughed out a bit.
“Your man isn’t here.. It’s only me.. Yet.. I won’t mind if you picture me as him..” He whispered, pushing my hands back. I had them on his chest, attempting to push him away. From just daily womanly chores, I had no muscles. No defense. I couldn’t do anything.
Suddenly, the pressure of his body was dragged back away from me, Like a rock lifted from my stomach region. “That is no way to treat a student.” The voice so soft, so familiar ringed out.. The voice that makes my heart speed up, my body freeze in the alone tone... The Tall man... He was here! When I was able to look, He had the teacher by the back of his shirt, being held up by something other than his hands. He peered over the teacher by over a foot high.
"W-What are you!?!" My teacher called out in utter awe.
"Who I am is not of importance. Though, what is important is what you attempted to do against the refusal of Alexander. If it was not obvious, he did not want you to touch him. You don't touch him. Ever. Only I do. Leave before I lose my temper." The tall man said extremely bitterly, dropping the teacher to floor. The teachers knees were shaking so much from the fear of his life, that he fell to the floor, upon his knees. He stared up at the extreme height of him as he attempted to crawl out of there. The door shut on its own. He faced me, going to the end of my bed.
"Little Boy...are you...Still an unspoiled treasure?" He asked, offering his hand to myself. I took it happily, allowing him to help me up and off of the bed.. When I touched his long, slender hand it made my heart almost beat out of my ribcage. The tall man was different now... His nose was much more defined... His lips were present currently, not as before, very slightly red.... I was staring at his new lips, I had missed that i had no answered the question.
“Little boy.... Your face looks to me...” He whispered, his hand gently under my chin, tilting my head down.. His face was at level with mine, a large bend for our height difference....
I closed my eyes.. If anything, I wanted him to become intimate with me... I wanted to be with him and just him, My tall savior.... I realized that I had moved myself, for thinking of it so fiercely and wanting, I made a connection with our lips, Taking him and myself by such surprised.. Yet, he was no fearful, his hand gently on my cheek, caressing it, another on the back of my neck.. I felt shiver and thrills throughout my entire body, my breath almost vanquished... He broke it yet he kept a hand onto my face, seeing if I was okay yet..
I wasn’t. It was too much... I was so amazed, so excited.. That I just blanked out... I had no memory of what happened next, render useless...
__________________________________________________________
When I awoken in a haze, I felt a warmth through my body... My hand went to my lips, causing me to remember what I had done.. I had kissed the tall man, without knowledge of his contentment.. Then, I proceeded to pass out.... It was like I was just teasing him.. My heart and my mind told me all the way that I loved him.. Yet I was fearful. I was fearful of what other people would think... If I would be accepted, If my family would be hurt.... No one should be hurt for what they do......
Most of all, I was fearful to love.... People that loved seem to either hurt me or leave.. He hasn’t yet.. I still desired him.. He followed me to this strange place... For me...
I rose myself out of bed, observing my surroundings. Everything looked normal, It was of night time. I left my room, to see what was around me.
My aunt had returned from her nighting out with the other gentlemen, it being obvious from the scattered clothing all upon the ground. Something caught my eye from across the room, on the surface that I do my studying on. It was a folded letter.
"Beholding a red rose reminds me of you and I, the smell of your scent intermingling with mine in that tie. The innocence the fresh petals emits when united with the stem's thorns, I will defend you my little darling. Till the day our lips encounter once more, I will be near."
I felt my face fill with blood, my heart beating uncontrollably. My eyes watered with his note..... It made me courageous of what would happen in the future.. That i could be with him, Brave through the criticism.. Yet i needed to disappear. I didn’t want people to view me with the tall man in this household, It would cause the riots and burning of our mansion.. My aunt was a crude woman, yet no one deserved to lose their home... I needed to leave.. I was going to return to the house before... The forest before... Vanish away, with no one crying for me..
I had to wait though.. The seasons was changing, going to be the deadest of winter shortly, the air had a frigid, the freeze chilling every poor soul to their bone, warning of a harsh winter... It was this spring I would leave, in the meantime i wish to see him again.. Tell him of my plans.. Speak with him, simply.
I returned to my cold room with no more remaining fear in my mind, and in my heart. I knew who it was I wanted to be with, to be his wife, his soulmate, his lover....
_______________________________________
The winter was a hard one, like I had predicted. The snow fell and fell until even my Aunt was house bounded. Though I took it as a blessing in disguise.. I didn’t have to view witness of my teacher for some time, And that was what we needed.. For what he had done. I could forgive him, I was not a person of anger, just not of now.. He knew my secret.. He could hold it against me...
I have yet to see my tall man again.... I breathed in the scent of his tie like a warm embrace, cradling me to sleep during the darkest of nights, warding off all dreams of terror.
I was fearful.. The winter was so cold, was he warm enough? Was he safe? He lived in the forest, but where is the question. Was he surviving such a harsh winter?
When I layed in bed, all i could image was him, frozen, shivering, dying in the cold, buried by the non-stop cold.... I would get snapped out of such time when called on by my aunt.
“Yes, My Lady June?” I proclaimed meekly, always as I approached her. She was feeling ill from her night of drinking herself to sleep. She did that with or without the company of a gentleman. So, this morn I was to serve her to health.
“I request hot tea, and please make it quick.” She said, as she took out her handkerchief and rubbed her nose with it. She seemed to have caught a hint of the flu, most likely from attempting to leave the warmth of the fireplace and make it to the local brewery. She failed, and quickly returned inside, but that small exposure to the cold air was all that was needed.
I went into the cupboards, searching for a tea bag. I then quickly realized that we without any, the last being used the previous day. I returned to my aunt in a quickness.
“My Lady June, we are without any tea bags as of now, what else do you request?” I questioned, going to her bedside. She looked at me with disgust.
“I had requested tea, now I demand it. If we are without, You are to go to the store. Not ask of me for something else.” She said, in a tone of disregarding. I peered out the window. The snow was 3 feet high, the wind pelting it against the window.
“But Auntie June, It is rather too cold for me to attempt to leave, peer out the window and bare witness!” I called out, Before the pain in my cheek made me remember my manors. There was not any ‘No’ Allowed towards her.
“You are disgraceful, I request a simple thing in my time of need! I care not of the weather hither, I request my tea.” She looked at me with a disgusted look, as if she cared for only her tea.
There was no more of an argument. I left her to get on all of my winter gear. A very heavy wool jacket, my stockings in layers, and my taller boots. I finished it with a scarf that my mother had knitted me, a scarf of red.
I left the house, high in hopes of making it safely.. Until I stepped out into the frosted air. My bones chilled from the very inner of me, my jacket doing little to keep me warm. I left on the 5 block trot to the local store.
Luckily, it was a store owned from the person who lived above it. It would be open, at least of my desperate request.
I approached the store, climbing through piles and piles of snow. The door was locked, of course, So i went to the door of which was entry for the owners. I knocked on it quite rudely, Yet my fingers were losing their feeling. I felt it was allowance for the rush.
“Yes, child?” The person called through the door, the snow would fall in if not.
“Kind sir! I really need to purchase some necessities from your little store, I had walked in the cold to retrieve these, may I please sir?!” I called out rather loud, the wind whipping my ears, making it almost impossible to hear.
There was no response. All i could do was wait in the chilled air to see his decision.
Luckily for me, The door to the store unlocked. i pushed snow away from it so i could push the door in without bringing feet of snow with me. I ran in, then pushed the door closed.
This was the store I went to every week but the last and this one. It made us short on more than just tea. He eyed me as I did my shopping for food supplies, and a lot of tea.
“Child, what possessed you to leave during such dangerous conditions?” The man was of scottish descent, it made his accent very interesting to me.
“My dearest Auntie has fallen ill, She requested tea and we were without. So, I left on this voyage. Thank you, Kind sir for allowing me to come during this rather unpleasant time.” I said, as I finished getting all of my items that i needed, And went to check out. He wrote me up for everything, With a face of disgust on him.
“Who would make such a child voyage through this for something as simple as tea? Must be delirious..” He was mumbling in disgust under his breath, with words around it that I didn’t even know, Most likely insults that my ears have not heard.
“Thank you kind sir, I much appreciate this. I will owe you a favor in times to come.” I said, as I took my tote with the grocery items in them, and left to make my voyage back... It was as painful as the way there, tripping and stomping through just high snow, fighting the winds caring new snowflakes..
Everything was covered in white, It was quite beautiful... Except one thing.
Something that was red. It was on a fence post, blowing in the harsh winds. As I approached it, It was a tie... Yet the tie was damaged. It was like the tall man’s tie.. There was a letter to the tie, though much of the wet snow has made it unreadable.
I took it, putting it inside of my jacket, close to my heart, to attempt to keep it dry as I made the return home..
I ran inside and to the fireplace. I dropped the goods from the store, and stripped until I was in my skimmies, the warmth of the fireplace keeping my fingers intact. They had turned shades of purple not even the royal wear.
the tie, I placed it tenderly near the fire to dry, yet to not burn. I ran to make tea, the “royal” was waiting for it. While the water was boiling on top of the stove, I returned to attempt to decipher the letter.
All i could make out was ‘Dear alexander... returning to woods.... spring....’ That was all the ink that the snow had left not dilated.
He was returning to the woods.... the forest, It must be hard for him... What if he needed my help? I felt I needed him.. I always could have him.. it was just the start of the harsh winter, the 12th month of the year, December. It would be a cold and dark lonely time without my tall man.. not even a sight of him... Yet, I would wait. If i take my leave now, it would be suicide.
It was all before the scottish man decided to see why i was allowed and demanded to leave in such winter.
About a week after that blizzard, the snow had subsided, the sun shined through the heavens, making it finally a fun time for the children to play, People could continue with their daily lives, walking through two feet of snow only. it was a pain but manageable.
There was a knock upon my door, about high noon. I was in the process of making the special requested soup, that took 3 hours of full attention towards it, for the “royal” of the house, ill under the covers.
The store owner was there, with a uniformed man. “Hello, young boy. This man here wishes to speak with your Aunt privately. Do you want some candy?” The store owner pondered as the uniformed man let himself in, walking towards the doors until he found out which was with my aunt. I sat down with the owner on the couch, eating the piece of candy he had offered me.
“Don’t worry now, He is just here to ask her a few questions, and check up on her, you know, to see if she is healthy.” He rubbed my hair, a rather uncomfortable feeling, While he chattered aimlessly after that towards the air. I excused myself back to the stove top, to stir the soup so it would not be ruined.
“Making soup for your aunt? how charming is that. you must be a good helper to her when she does the housework.” He said, looking over my shoulder casually. I knew what he was doing, what they were doing. and honestly, i welcomed it. She would finally get what she deserved for treating me as if i was her slave for all of these many years.
“No, I do all of the cooking and cleaning of the household. She is gone most of the hours of the day and night, doing whatever she needs to get done.” I shrugged like it was a casual conversation, though when i looked at him from the corner of my eye, I could see his disgusted face.
In this society, the men were suppose to do all of the working, farming, business, anything. the women were suppose to cook, clean, and work if there is a family business. Men were to be trained for work from an early age, to follow the footsteps of their father.
The officer came out, looking really disgusted. “Let’s make leave of this, Erickson, i explained to her the need for....health.” He looked right at me as he said it. They thought i was uneducated, I imagined. I knew what they were doing here. It was just going to lead to more pain to me.
My aunt left the bed, which i had not witnessed since prior to her cold and the snow falling, to excuse the men out of the house herself. She then faced towards me, her face full of rage. I was going to feel the wrath of something I did not intentionally do.
“You ungrateful little b*****d! How dare you go and tell that police officer that i am miss training and treating you! I worked my a*s off for this life for us, and this is how you repay me?! you call the officers onto me because i asked one little request of you! You Are punished for the remainder of your time here!” She came to me, slapping my face with the hand that she wore diamond rings on. It sliced the top layer of the case of my cheek. it caused me to back track, falling back onto my behind in front of her.
“My Lady June, I meant no such thing! He did it towards his own accord!” I flinched as the rage boiled the blood in her veins. She looked over to the pot, picked up the boiling pot of soup, and flicked her wrist, pouring it all over my exposed flesh, burning me terrible. She then threw the now empty pot at me, and returned to her room, with her followed words to be; ‘Don’t forget i request soup, and make it quick.”
I laid, throbbing in pain from the slice on my cheek, the bruises on my face, my skin raised and burnt from the heat... There was nothing i could do. I could either re-make the soup for a returned treatment of this.. or.. leave.
I chose the better decision. I knew where he was at. I was going there. He would hug me, make me feel everything in the world was good.
I left to my quarters, retrieving a bag i had bought outside of permission for things such as. It was a bag that you wore on your back, it made things easier to carry. I put on my jacket, my stockings, my boots, the scarf... My red tie. I wore it under my jacket as to not get questioned for it.
I worked through the pain of my burns to pack what i needed, some food, some extra clothing.. The letters, the weather-spoiled tie.... I knew once i walked out of that door, I was no longer welcomed into this household.
I was turning my back on this household, my family, this village.... And it made me feel happier then i have been for a long while now. I looked back at everything.. I would miss nothing.. I regretted nothing..
I was off on my way. It was a long walk, about 10 miles to the forest of which i know he was in.. My tall man... I treaded through the treacherous, ice cold snow. The clouds in the sky was threatening another blizzard, The sun had retreated behind them...
The villagers had retreated back indoors as the first snow began to trickle down... I just pulled the scarf over my head, around my neck... To keep warm.. I had retrieved broken gloves from the garbage, since they were unacceptable when I needed to purchase them.
I would fall, I would tremble, my legs would give out from such effort i pulled on them.. But all i could do was stand back up , and keep walking. The pain in my legs were growing so tremendously that I was sobbing for a while of the walk. my toes went slowly numb. i welcomed the numbness, they kept me warmer..
The blizzard picked up, getting more and more rapid downpour, the wind starting to lash the hard snow against my face, collecting on my jacket until I looked as if I was just another rock covered by snow....
I had left rather late for such a walk, The sun had fallen on me, hiding my way... Though, when we came here i memorized the way with such a bright detail, i would not get lost..
I Hoped. It would normally take about 3 hours to walk such a distance, but with the added snow my total time was increasing more and more, past that point.. Soon, it was late evening, the sun had completely fallen, taking it’s warmth with it. It dropped drastically in that short while, the air falling cold and dense...
After a treacherous walk I finally made it to the house.. The house in which directed towards where the woods where at.. I made no time to admire how the trees covered in new snow looked very gorgeous, especially the weeping willows.. I had to find him, I had to make sure he was alright.. My legs were going humb higher and higher up, the entire walk.. to about my knees... I fell constantly.. I walked in the woods for a short while until they gave out completely... I was stuck.. This close to him... I sat, under a tree, as i watched out, looking for anything that resemble him.. any red.. It was hard to see through the frozen tears my body was reacting against my will.. I couldn’t believe....
I made it this close to him,... and now.. i was going to lose... Lose all i had done to try and get here.. Lose all of the effort.. everything....
I suddenly heard a whisper of a voice next to me. “Little boy... You are far away from home..” Those were the first word he had spoken to me.. and there he was.. In his splendid glory...
“Kind sir.. I will..give you my mind...my body.. my heart...and my soul..for just a chance to feel the warmth of your body...” I breathed softly, looking up at him.. my heart was pounding so hard..... I was in such shock from him finding me, again.. He picked me up as if i was nothing.. Cradling myself to him, I felt as if a blanket was protecting me from everything.. a layer of warmth filled my body, my every being....
“My precious child.. I will take care of you.... you will never be without my arms around you again..” I felt his lips gently against my forehead, as he caressed my hair gently..I looked up at his face... He had a gaze, his eyes were dark yet.. there.. Like.. he was developing more and more with me...
Soon, we were in the warmth of a fire.. He had a house far up in the trees, climbing up to it with my in his arms like he was a spider, effortlessly.. He had me sat close next to the fire as he stripped me of my clothing, everything down to where I was nude... Everything was wet, he set important things near the fire...
He wrapped a blanket around my bare body, his gaze always towards me... “My precious boy.. you were foolish to make such a trip here.... It was very dangerous in this time of the season.. But.. If you did not i would have made my way to you..” He gently caressed my cheek, the one without the developing scar, as he looked into my eyes more.. he smiled shyly, as he shook his head gently..
Our gazes were locked.. My heart was beating fast then it had ever before.. His scent was so prominent that i would have died a very happy child now... Yet.. I knew I couldn’t.. I was his precious child... To ever be with him.. I leaned in.. Locking my lips against him... I had little experience with such a thing, and so did he.. I felt it was passionate and romantic, Like there was a strong mutual love between both of us.. He sat down, Moving me so i was upon his lap like just a child.. His arms wrapped around my body, holding my hands.. I regained the feeling quickly in everything... My blood was pounding through my every being..
“My... kind sir.. Is it wrong.. that I love you?” I asked, looking back at his face, my head against his chest.
“My precious child.... If it is wrong.. Then right is what we shall not be..” He whispered, As he put another blanket on top of us before laying down.. was on his chest, I could feel his heartbeat... his breath coming ever so offend.. He was turning so more human from the time before this... So much more, Yet there was still the side of him that made me feel attracted towards him immediately.. He would be my lover.. my friend.. my protector.. everything I always wanted....
~The End