Who are you?...

One of my dreams...

I sit on my wooden porch

surrounded by tree's

if you listen 

they whisper in the breeze...

My eye's fall upon water

my very own lake

it's clear and fresh

perfect for dipping your toes...

Sat here in my chair

with my knee tight against my chest

looking out at the impossible

not wanting this scene to go...

then something erupts the water

I hear a noise

of a small boat coming this way

who? I wonder...

I rose from my seat

and leant against the rail

everything was a blur

even what was in view...

I could see the ripples

I could see its reflection

but not much of anything else...

Am I waking up

or is this how it would be?

when my eyes close

will ever I see who is in that boat?

My vision gets worst

as I watch this figure

climb onto my port

slowly

made there way to me...

They came upon my porch

blackness dimmed

"who are you?"

I whisper....

Reviews

[Forest Green]

Winsome wonderings...a nice suspension of belief, desire, and experience.

All blended by the longings of an willing heart...

Very well done...

[highthought]

the boat was in its way on the road of life
seeing u by that lake wasnt in mind
sorry for disturbing the scene which u dont it to go
boating is free so is other things u know

[Karina Longo]

Wow. This is so graphic, the imagery is perfect. "My eye's fall upon water
my very own lake" is one of my favourite lines. So witty! It was a real pleasure to read this piece. Brilliant!

[A]

I just checked your writings since I haven't read any in a while :))
I'm glad I did
I lived this dream while reading this poem, very powerful imagery and well described throughout the whole piece
It really held my attention from the first few lines
wonderful write Stefanie :))

[{A}shley {B}lack @-;-]

I loved the descriptive imagery within this poem and the flow and structure compliment eachother perfectly
this images that you create are strong and a feeling of nostalgia like an awaking moment towards the end makes me wish there was more to read
thank you for sharing this poem
100/100 from me

[Mauricio Montoya]

it make me think of poetic storie in a dream like state that in the end leaves me to ponder.
Excellent write.

[Sweet & Tender Hooligan]

'I sit on my wooden porch surrounded by tree's if you listen they whisper in the breeze...' that's such a beautiful opening to a poem. Nice use of words, imagery and build up.

[SpokenWord]

Yes I agree with Timtim the build up of suspense was done like I was reading a book over reading a poem. Very good opening scene to a movie even. I like poets who can take a scene with only some one sitting on a porch and turn it into art. I have to say this was excellent poetry

[Timtim]

Very nice suspense build up. It a great piece, because it keeps you expecting more, even at the end you anticipate the piece to continue. Nice write.