Heal the Sained

A song, needs a beat, any ideas?

how are we gonna make it in this world of ours
Where everybody's drivin' planes, trains, or cars
And people gettin' drunk in all the bars
the sky's the limit but we have machines on Mars
and they tell us that the world is ours

To change
Rearrange
blessed the pained
Heal the sained

I don't know where I'll be tomorrow
I know I won't drown in my sorrow
I won't be another soul to go
Everybody else will hit the bottle
I'll be the one standing on top though

To change
rearrange
bless the pained
Heal the sained

This is me it's who I am
and I don't care if you give a dam
I'll be driving through town
Get out of my way just scram
I don't need you bringing me down

To change
rearrange
Bless the pained
heal the sained

That's my goal
that much I know
I won't fall into the hole
even if I grow old
I will still fight for what I hold

To change
rearrange
Bless the pained
Heal the sained

this is my game
My fame
No dame
Only my name
it's all the same

To change
rearrange
Bless the pained
heal the sained

Living in this place we call the earth
where we were at our birth
And our death
When nothing's left
my soul still won't rest

To change
rearrange
Bless the pained
heal the sained

Same story it's getting old
always do what you're told
But I want my fate to hold
till I've showed
That I won't go cold

To change
Rearrange
Bless the pained
Heal the sained

Reviews

[Owlgirl]

Wow! Great job! It's amazing! Not too sure what a beat would be though, just play around with it and see where it goes. :)

[Irvette Dauphine]

i like this poem and how you arrange the rhyme
and this is cool..
keep writing like this :)

[Sanity]

Wow, I love this. The lyrics were very creative. I love the ending two lines of the first part.
"the sky's the limit but we have machines on Mars
and they tell us that the world is ours"
I thought that was very clever, and I liked the way you used sane in this. It was different from the way I see most people use it and I liked that. Very outside of the box. I would love to hear someone sing this sometime

[Harley (arbiter)]

Thanks! If I had a beat I would attempt to sing it myself but my voice is a little off pitch :D

[The Analog Kid]

unique play on the word "sane." Love the explanation of the meaning...real cool!

[Harley (arbiter)]

Thanks I'm glad you liked it. Do you, by any chance, have an idea on a beat?

[The Analog Kid]

Maybe kind of a rap or high energy beat like "Killing in the Name" by Rage against the machine. Either that or listen to some old "Staind" or "Alice in Chains" slow stuff maybe....

[Harley (arbiter)]

I've heard "Killing in the Name" and I like the song. It had completely slipped my mind until now. Thanks. I will. I would rather it be a rock'ish beat than rap

[The Analog Kid]

yeah I don't care much for rap either...i like maybe a little "faith no more" or something or Aerosmith rap....lol

[Harley (arbiter)]

There ya go that's the stuff right there haha Aerosmith rocks.

[The Analog Kid]

my favorite new old Aerosmith is "No More, No More" off Toys in the attic

[Harley (arbiter)]

Well I don't know if its new, old, or in between but my favorite Aerosmith song is "Dream On"

[Color of the Iris]

Can you explain to me what "Heal the Sained" means? I'm not sure I understand quite what it means. But other than that, this piece was very truthful, and it very well demonstrated how we often watch others around us fall to the pressures and temptations of society, while some of us sit on the outside looking in. That select few of us learn to rise above and push through the pain. This was a great poem that painted a wonderful image of what strength is. Nice job, Harley, well done. :)

[Harley (arbiter)]

Well the sain people see the world without blur or deciet. The insane people are spared from seeing how cold the world is. I honestly can't explain exactly what I'm trying to say. It also has to do with how the sane people are like pawns in life. Doing what their told at like jobs or just anywhere really. Again I can't really completely explain what I meant by that you'll have to draw some of your own conclusions but I'm glad you liked it

[Color of the Iris]

I understand what you're trying to say, lol. I can't explain what you mean either, but I get it. :D

[Harley (arbiter)]

Yeah its one of those things that has no words for I guess. All in the mind. :)

[♪The Girl Next Do..]

AWESOMENESS. You should definitely write more songs!! Great work!

[Harley (arbiter)]

Thanks! Clever use of the authors note huh? Told ya there was a way.

[♪The Girl Next Door♪]

Clever indeed. Yo smart

[Harley (arbiter)]

:D

[∠( ᐛ 」..]

This song/poem is awesome! You rhymed really good. The title is awesome too.
Excellent job! :D
100/100

[Harley (arbiter)]

Thanks, any ideas on a beat?

[∠( ᐛ 」∠)＿]

I'm thinking for one...

[Harley (arbiter)]

Thanks. But don't think too hard though. It hurts when that happens >.

[Aurora .I.]

O_O This honey- is amazing. I love this poem! I especially like the chorus! It's beautiful. As for title help hmm...my favorite line is 'Healed the sained' So maybe that could be the title? I don't know. Awesome poem love.

[Harley (arbiter)]

Thanks and it seems that should be the title. :J thanks hun

[Melody]

I can see it as Heal the Sained, which I actually think should be stained. Lol

[Harley (arbiter)]

Maybe, and I wrote sained because all the sane people ...well their still sane. I can't really explain how I'm thinking on that but its like the sane, normal, people are suffering because their sane and normal. See? :/

[Melody]

Yeah, I think I get it.

[RachelReaper]

This could be an epic rock song. As for help with a name...eh... I'm not the greatest with names... but my favorite part was "That's my goal
that much I know
I won't fall into the hole
even if I grow old
I will still fight for what I hold " it sounds defiant, like your going to keep fighting no matter what. powerful.

[Harley (arbiter)]

Thanks, that's exactly what I was trying to say. :)