Dear darling broken one

let yourself bloom past the withered glooms...

dear darling broken one,
stop trying to catch what's gone,
stop trying to hold on,
the gold coin you made a wish on,
has been long flown with river eversince dawn.
the currents in the flow won't make it easy for you to tape your torn,
but its a game which keeps you to move on and on.

dear darling rotten one,
you could get all you want,
but it's you who has got to start making it rain over the dry parts,
the days that you're living feel so short,
you wont even know when you won't be anymore able to connect the dots,
remember the moment you knew what you were made for and try to never rot.

dear darling young one,
live every second of whats coming next with joy and little prays,
when you'll be all fragile and grey,
when you won't be able to get up after falling again and again,
when you won't be able to hold steady your tray,
you'll remember the days you could get away,
so don't do something to regret any of your days.

dear darling healing one,
things and journeys would be sweet and sour,
stop wasting your time on faces that don't even exactly know who you are,
stop wasting your energy screaming those shuddering names inside your heart,
pour it over the skies that could grow you apart,
let a little light pass through your trembling dark.

dear darling daydreaming one,
stop making wishes for people you think could be the ones for you,
stop losing yourself for them, just put it on loose,
stop breaking yourself for them, find your own blues,
nobody is ever worth enough to have a piece of you,
so get them all and reign over the kingdom like it's yours,
slay over the horses and they all would bow down to your muse.

dear darling different one,
stop trying to lose your puzzle pieces and make out something they wanna see,
everybody else tries to swim in the same sea,
but you be your your kind of pretty,
people would try to cut your trees,
but hold yourself smooth and rather sting their bees,
after a few stangnant years you'll get to the old you and see,
how you could be anyone but you chose to let break your knees,
so be the biggest rainbow, the only thing for a moment everyone could see.

dear darling shining one,
not everyday is a good day,
but there's something good in everyday,
not everyone is good at everything,
but each one is good at something,
realise that there's no such thing as a good or bad time,
its you who has the power to call its rhyme,
cast a spell on it, fight it, win it and never lose the way you shine!

Author's Note

tell me your favourite lines!

and also if you would like to add something with respect to your lives or if you wanna say something to someone close to you, write it down starting with "dear darling ...... one", i'll be excited to read! :)

Reviews

[The_Ancient_Rock]

Dear darling... Most blessed one...
Do keep shining your light,
Hold on to it, through the darkest night...
Shine pure and shine bright,
And may time prove a love that is right.

Really enjoyed this poem.
Thank you for sharing.
Keep up that inspiration.

Blessed be!

[grace]

THIS!! I just loved what u did here. This stanza fits my poem like a piece of a puzzle. Thank you so much bestie!

[The_Ancient_Rock]

You are welcome bestie...
I really love your work.
Blessed be!

[JessyJacob]

I know this is your original pic of broken wrist, I can see. How is the hand, do you use it normally as the other.

[grace]

Actually, no its not. I just chose to use it from somewhere online because this pic is something i had in my head while i was writing the poem, I think the hand in trying to hold the daisies together is really beautiful. But there's not a big meaning in the picture. They are mainly for the aesthetics and essence of the poem.

[JessyJacob]

If you feel everyone has been in your past is daisy, then it doesn’t matter for you to break even as it is like changing clothes. But there is something uniqueness in every dress you wear so don’t show all same otherwise there is no point to change people and get the same type.

[grace]

Please, it would be better if you focus on the poem and not the picture i used, i didn't create the picture, but i did create the poem. And what you analyzed is not something i intended to show here but i still liked it because your words are right Thank you for giving my poem a read. It means a lot to me. Also, you said you didn't like my stories (i write poems btw) but i noticed you've merely read two of mine.

[JessyJacob]

If I had to read yours then this life is not sufficient that much you write and I don’t want to lose my time in knowing something which I already knew. So don’t worry that I am not reading and just I read which I love to read it again or look it again.

With regards
Jessy Jacob!

[Writergurl]

not everyone is good at everything,
but each one is good at something,

Love this part, This is amazing, nicely expressed

[grace]

Thank you so much! I'm glad you liked it :)

[Betty Hermelee]

I love "dear darling broken one" it is a good healing process to move on...not to get stuck in your own darkness...and I love "Dear Darling Daydreaming one" because I do a lot of daydreaming and and in this case, your wishes may never come true so :get them all"....All of these notions are equally as good.... it tries to solve the problems of life.... well done
Warmly, B

[grace]

Thank you so much for the beautiful comment, dear Betty! I'm glad you like it :)

[Betty Hermelee]

You’re very welcome dear Grace
I would appreciate if you would peek at my writing
Warmly,
B

[grace]

Yes, i would love to!

[Katarzyna Anna Koziorow..]

You've used a lot of words, but the poem is absolutely not overwhelming. I read it with real pleasure. It is a pity that there are so few real poets in the world. You have a tremendous talent! :)

[grace]

Thank you so much for such a beautiful compliment! I'm grateful to u for reading it and encouraging me! ❤️

[Einstein Noodle]

oh my .... V1 and V2 L1 are my favorite ... the contrast and surprise in V2 is kind of shocking ... V1 started me on a path of ...ok ...this is from the bvoice of one who broke off the relationship and was encouraging the broken one to go ahead and move on ... life is a river ... flow downstream until you can emerge .. but then I read about the "....rotten one" ... wow! the theme wanders a bit for me ... not truly sure of the goal until closing verse .. maybe it's just because the contrast mentioned unbalanced me throughout ... i thik you could expand on any one of the verses .. they are all relatable in one way or another ...
E.

[Wanderer]

thank you for sharing such a wonderful poem

[grace]

Thank YOU for reading it

[Chris Shaw]

I like the way you have approached this poem. Looking at a different aspects of the same dear ones character, both good and bad. We are all a mix. Nice job Grace.

Chris

[grace]

Thank you so much for appreciating dear Chris! i'm glad you enjoyed it :)

[JayG]

I get what you’re trying to do. But if you’re going to use rhyming, there’s a lot that comes with it.

For example: never bend the line to the needs of the rhyme. The reader will always know where it was done. The trick is to make the thought perfect and the rhyme seem almost accidental.

In the line, “but hold yourself smooth and rather sting their bees,” it’s obvious that you needed a rhyme for “knees,” and so ended up with that line, which doesn’t make a lot of sense.

But of more importance, with structured poetry, once you establish the rhyming pattern, with a few exceptions, it stays the same for both the rhyming scheme and, the length of each line as measured in stressed syllables for each stanza. For a great intro to that, and prosody, in general, jump over to Amazon and look at the excerpt to Stephen Fry’s, The Ode Less Traveled. Aside from being a great comedian, the man has a gift for explaining poetic structure. You’ll be amazed at what he has to say about the flow of words in speech. I recommend reading it to both the poet and fiction-writer.

Another great help is Mary Oliver’s, A Poetry Handbook. It can do wonders for your understanding of poetry, in general, and make the writing of it even more fun. You can download it at the site I link to just below.
https://yes-pdf.com/book/1596

I also recommend the Shmoop site. Log in as Student, then use the button by the mid-page search window to select Poetry. In addition to some great poetry, in the pages that follow each one they analyze the why and how of its success.

So…as far as being more reader oriented, this is dramatically better than what I’ve seen before of your work. Nice going!

[grace]

Thank you so much for reading and analyzing my poem so carefully and giving your honest reviews! of course, i am not a poet by profession and don't know a lot of things about it. I just like being here and posting something i have experienced before. And it feels nice to learn more about it from people like you :)

about the line, "rather sting their bees" i just didn't write it for rhyming cz in my pov, it does make a whole lot of sense, its like bees are symbolizing the problems and insecurities that come our way and stop us from moving on, so instead we should get them out smoothly without causing any damages to ourselves or others.

Thank you so much for suggesting these poetry books by the way. I will surely check upon them when i get time because as a med student, it gets hard to make time for reading and all.