way to my messy home

those eyes once looked ethereal, once, they really did...

its like a heavy weight has been lifted off of my body

all the pleasures of relief are being breathed in

a part of me is in denial with the feeling of disappointment

its blind to the stillness

and my mind is still in a sense of disbelief and would be until the acceptance

about the fact that the big diamond turned out to be a fake one

and yet, people can still see it as beautiful and magnificent

but to me, all the magnetic energy got vanished 

as if a switch has been pushed off 

all the busiest lines so far has stopped receiving phone calls

maybe some connections broke 

i know i say that i feel relieved

but i still realize that some part of me would still feel nervous 

and struck by the butterfly effect when you'd be around

all those songs i wrote,

that paperwork,

the framed storied and attached pictures in my head

never thought i would but yeah

i feel so ready to call them dead

i still can't believe how distant we've become

we're still the stars but maybe one of us had fallen on the ground

i can't look at those two eyes i once called as ethereal 

cause now instead of those butterflies or questions

i would just see the disgrace and disrespect

i dont feel like i owe this world something anymore

pushing ur ghosts out of my mind made me fall again, for myself, even more.

...

your sunshine reflected upon me, beautiful as it was

but the thin air in between made me anxious above all

it felt butterflies but they grew wild when i thought and overthought

it felt like,

like i struggled with awe through the storm

but now i finally found surface

like after wandering for so long through the unfamiliar yet beautiful roads, 

i finally found the way to my messy home i never thought i'd miss before

like finally i can think of something else

like all the ivy that grew over me has now washed itself...

Author's Note

i may delete this one later

Reviews

[The_Ancient_Rock]

No place like home. Even if it is messy.
Home is where the heart is they say.
Sometimes people in life can get you down.
We can build expectactions and dreams and get disappointed.
Anyway I am glad you found your home and peace of mind.
We should all have a home.
I enjoyed reading this piece.
Well done Grace.
Hugs.
🌹

[Fabian G. Franklin]

This poem sounds like a plea almost to return to the way things once were or to reform them into what could be. It seeks clarity and meaning within the confines of familiar structures and ends on a note of hope. I enjoyed the read.

[JessyJacob]

Hi Grace ful heart,
i think you shouldn't delete this, i could see how much you missed me. Do you think the person who created mess would leave like that, the person never left you, you indeed passed orders, it was initiated by the third person i know where you couldnt agree for that thinking that the person would never leave you, though misled by command of you, obeying orders, and the respect for Gurus. The only two reasons she had at that time are that you are fine and went away from her, and it was you until i accept your order, you would have never made my mind calm. But you didnt even leave bit of thought that you love her so much and you dont want to leave her though you said to leave. That was total obsession forced me to accept your order. I never a looked guy in my married life, you know that better, and when i am with you never thought of any, i think God proved my true love which i made to you, now, then and forever, you are the only for me, which made me to come back to you, the one worthy of whom will be with them only. I am feeling to drop tear for the above lines how you missed her. Thank you i know you love mom, definetely you would do anything for her, thats why i took a promise over her, that you should marry me, and you will make it. God forbid, if any negative force may block, i married you in my heart, with your last name in my name. I love your grace, for your love upon me. Dont leave me, ever, how that situation is difficult or severe bad. Missing you,
jessy jacob
with love.

[light and ashes]

Don't use got, just vanished.
Also, you don't need the word, as, just ethereal...
are, instead of or.

Honestly, I say good for you, girl.
I think you did a really good job writing this.

[Bhuyanshi Talukdar]

Your poem is beautiful and moving. You have a talent for writing that is truly special, and your words are able to convey complex emotions in a way that is both relatable and powerful. I was struck by the honesty and vulnerability of your words, and I think that many people will be able to connect with what you have written. Your use of imagery and metaphor is particularly effective, and it helps to create a vivid picture in the reader's mind. Overall, I think that your poem is a testament to the power of art to help us process our emotions and connect with others. Thank you for sharing your work with the world.

[grace]

Thank you so much for reading it! I'm moved by your kind words too

[Chris Shaw]

Beautiful and unfamiliar are not the same as comfortable. It sounds as though you have fallen out of love with beautiful and unfamiliar.and pine for what you knew and loved best. I couldn't help thinking about a pair of red stilettos I had once, they looked great, but they didn't have the comfort of my slippers. Relationships, you never know if they are going to work out. Can be full of promise and then don:t live up to expectation. Enjoyed the read Grace.

Chris

[grace]

This is such a beautiful comment! Thank you so much for understanding and reading my poem! I'm glad you enjoyed it :)

[Chris Shaw]

I did enjoy your poem Grace. Don't delete it

[grace]

okay i won't :) thank you

[Coyote Poetry]

This is poetry dear Grace.
"your sunshine reflected upon me, beautiful as it was
but the thin air in between made me anxious above all
it felt butterflies but they grew wild when i thought and overthought
it felt like,
like i struggled with awe through the storm
but now i finally found surface"
The above lines I love and I do understand. We will survive many storms and become wiser. We hope. Thank you for sharing the amazing poetry.
Coyote

[grace]

I am really glad you liked it :) thanks for reading it!

[Coyote Poetry]

I did enjoy dear Grace and you are welcome.

[Kat]

I really like this poem Grace it's a great write please don't delete this i really like it!

[grace]

Thank you so much for saying that

[Kat]

Ofc! You are one of my favorite writers i love your writes

[grace]

i can't thank you enough! you're lovely!

[Kat]

Grace you are phenominal!

[grace]

Thanks for being so so sweet! You brought a huge smile on my face by saying that! People like you keep my going for writing even more and better!

[Kat]

Of course Grace! I love knowing that I can make your day and make you smile brings joy to my heart!