Take My Hand

Riddled with pain I call Your name,

When can I win this game?

My life is torn and brought You shame

Sin as visible as the tail of nine cats,

Brought down on Him like a cane.

“Take My hand.”

 

Malevolent torture consumes my being

If only it were leaving!

Pain is constantly conceiving

If only I kept believing!

“Take My hand.”

 

Why won’t you listen?

I call to you, but nothing!

Is there something that I am missing?!

Just please LORD, give me something!

“Take My hand.”

 

Frustrated and torn, my pain grows deeper

Maybe I should call the reaper?

Contemplate becoming a leaper…

Or…maybe…just maybe, my life is a keeper?!

 

“My child, you called, I answered.

Long ago, as you requistioned.

My child it was you who did not believe

Did not trust in me.

Refused to see.

My hand has been long outstretched.

It has not been a gruesome test.

I love you still my child.

My love is amaranthine and paradisiacal.

You just need to learn to let go.

And simply let me.

My sweetest child

Take My hand and let Me.”

By underwriter    2/1/2011

Reviews

[jessicamarie19]

I too would like to address a critical comment that I believe to be unfair - I like the extended final stanza. The shorter stanzas at the beginning fit the mood of the words - they have a quicker tempo, they rush forward and cut off for breath, like someone who is emotional and overwhelmed. The last stanza is calming and flowing and helps to resolve the dissonance from the beginning - again, something I feel is very fitting for the piece. And besides, when it's God we're having a conversation with, we should always let Him do the majority of the talking!

Thanks for sharing!

[OT]

I really enjoyed this!! very sweet and well written!! (and congratulations on Top Writer badge)!!

[cfix]

Now I really enjoyed this write here.
This is wonderful. Very well written.

[Christopher.Holmberg]

This is amazing. "
Riddled with pain I call Your name, When can I win this game?" The first 2 lines were captivating...they lured me in. I want to see more compositions from you...you have talent! 10/10

[Chelsea]

Not sure, but this poem is blank!?!? Maybe writerscafe messed up or something when you were posting it. Just letting you know :)