Breath of Death

Breath of Death

A Poem by KeelyJane

I exhaled a piece of me when I let you go,
my heart be my breath

I gasped for your love,
I breathed it to death

I inhale the cold and emptiness,
fill my lungs in chest

The air of goodbye,
suffocate this love for the best

© 2020 KeelyJane


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Reviews

A raw exchange of letting love go for the suffocation of emptiness! No one can understand the feeling until they live it. WTG, KeelyJane

Posted 9 Years Ago


Letting go = the hardest thing = the greatest testament of love for another. You smashed it here KJ. Emotional work.

Posted 9 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Very descriptive, and impacts the reader. Very nice writing.

Posted 10 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

This is heartbreaking and so sad! But that doesn't mean that it's not good :P
Well done

Posted 10 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

lovely writing .Heart break is b***h lol but we survive

Posted 10 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Nice little write, I like these parts:
"I exhaled a piece of me when I let you go,"

"I gasped for your love,
I breathed it to death"

Posted 11 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Not a while ago, I breathed "The breath of death"
I know this feeling.

Posted 11 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

These words describe the truth of real heartbreak. Beautiful!

Posted 11 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

very good words indeed...i'd drop the commas they only take away from yer words here...I think

Posted 11 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Fantastic! every line is like a punch to the face and the last to the groin! In all seriousness though, very powerful stuff, well penned. :)

Posted 11 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.


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1414 Views
22 Reviews
Rating
Shelved in 1 Library
Added on October 15, 2013
Last Updated on September 28, 2020

Author

KeelyJane
KeelyJane

Albuquerque, NM



About
I'm just a girl with a lifetime of experiences. I've taken from those experiences what can be put into words and poetically put them together to share with all of you. These are my contributions. .. more..

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