Heart Attack

Loving you is gonna kill me
Suffocate my internal breath
Bring life to my emotions
Send my heart to its death

Taking the part of me I feel the most
In exchange for a promise made of sand
Where grains of pain will fall through
Leaving me  in the palm of your hand

The vein that carries my love
Exposes far within my chest
Where ruby tears of the cardiac 
Are in emotional arrest

Reviews

[A. H. Pinley]

Love is a miracle in life. We can't explain attraction aside from the obvious, but love is something entirely different. The love that a mother has for a child that would have her sacrifice everything for her child even if it kills her. The love shared between spouses for richer or poor, in sickness and health, for better or worse, love has this beautiful characteristic about it that I'm almost willing to bet leave scientist baffled. Good work!

[B-poet]

Emotionally intriguing, very well written, I love the tone and message within your riveting poem. Great write. :)

[Sami Khalil]

A very nice poem. Truly enjoyable...:)

[Rita L. Sev]

"Where ruby tears of the cardiac are in emotional arrest." This is an awesome image, a perfectly penned metaphor. Well done!

[kublakhan27]

A stunning portrait of a heart in despair with some nicely-woven imagery...great piece Keely :)

[quinfinn]

love as a potential heart attack, interesting concept. i tend to think of love as an attack on the heart anyway, so this appeals to me. very nicely expressed!

[jacob erin-cilberto]

really good metaphor and you carry it through the piece...i find many metaphors are often brought up in one stanza and dropped...

this really works..."emotional arrest"

and yet knowing this will happen, we still go after that love anyway...just like someone who has all of the symptoms of heart trouble but lives with reckless abandon anyway.

jacob

[zainul]

Wonderful work.
Read twice and intend to read more.

[John Alexander McFadyen]

Keely yet another good piece of poetry with an appropriate and lovely metaphor.