It's All You

It's All You

A Poem by KeelyJane

I just want you to hold me, I want to feel my body in your arms
I want your embrace to embrace me;
your caress to caress to caress me;
your heart to love me;
your lips to taste me.

I just want you to feel me; the affection
the bond; the energy
Feel the chemistry of us; the connection.

I just want you to know my emotions
know my ins; my outs
I want you to know me.
I want you to know I want you.
I want you to know I need you.
I want you to know I know you; know you know me
and just be.

I just want my imagination.
I want what I ask for in dreams,
in prayers and in thought;
Us.
I want what I've got.

You're so perfect yet can seem ,still, so far.
You keep me wishing for what you are;
What you can be; what I remember;
What I have tasted; what you have shown me.
I want what you have planted in my mind as the way it should be.

I just want it all.
It's all you.


© 2020 KeelyJane


Author's Note

KeelyJane
I wrote this as I posted it so it is completely unrevised and unedited. So, we'll see... :)

My Review

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Featured Review

Ok got the warning. Although I found it difficult to follow the rhyming pattern, this is another tremendously passionate piece with a tinge of desperation. It flows like water off glass until the penultimate stanza:
'You're so perfect yet can seem ,still, so far.
You keep me wishing for what you are;
What you can be; what I remember;
What I have tasted; what you have shown me.
I want what you have planted in my as the way it should be.'
Maybe:
'You're so perfect yet can still seem afar.
You keep me wishing for what you are;
What you can be; what I remember;
What I have tasted; what you have shown me.
I want what you have planted in me as what should be.'


Posted 11 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.




Reviews

So raw and filled with so much personal emotion. I really liked it. Dont change a thing. It reads almost like a journal entry. Thanks for sharing.

Posted 11 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Passionate piece, you expressed the right words in this work. Great job!

Posted 11 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Very powerful. Nicely done.

Posted 11 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

it sounds ...real.

Posted 11 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

wow nicely done

Posted 11 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

there are times songs pop into my head as I read..this is one of those times..giggling .. I kept reading and all I heard was... Toby Keith's - I wanna talk about me


Posted 11 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

It's actually fantastic! Sure wish a girl had said those things to me. Awesome write. Absolutely adore it!

Posted 11 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Raw emotions for the one you love.

Posted 11 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

To me this felt honest. it was charged with emotion and desire. I liked the choppy form as it added to the need and the want and the longing. Like the wirter became out of breath while writing as I did while reading. Very nice KJ

Posted 11 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

awesome write here, Keely. i felt every line in the depths of my passionate soul. well done!

Posted 11 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.


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272 Views
16 Reviews
Rating
Shelved in 1 Library
Added on March 20, 2013
Last Updated on July 23, 2020

Author

KeelyJane
KeelyJane

Albuquerque, NM



About
I'm just a girl with a lifetime of experiences. I've taken from those experiences what can be put into words and poetically put them together to share with all of you. These are my contributions. .. more..

Writing

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