#6 Marginally Excluded

Naomi finds being left out hard to bear.

3 days later. Dear Diary.

Later on I was in a place where I remembered that Kyle was in. Having a birds eye view of the place, the pathway is a square U shape. Where I was staring at ahead of me, I could go left or right, and if I did either, I could then go forward to the space there. Instead I decided to stay with what was in front of me, as I had already walked the path to get here, so I thought it would be a good idea for me to see what was in store with the people that were around. To be more clear, imagine a rectangle area full of squares of a 3x2 grid, and the uppermost middle square being off limits for the space we could be in, that's what it would be like.

Right now I was imagining the world down below, and how beautiful it must be. I've seen it before from above, but I've never actually gone to see it for myself. I love the way they arrange the colours of the place. Ahead of me there were two people a couple of metres away from me, and I had to walk on the concrete that appeared to be crumpled up as if it was cracked or made up of stones, but it wasn't.

The place had such a hushed and safe feel to it, that wouldn't have any use if you were by yourself there for long. In the background I could hear the quiet chatter drivelling away. I remembered this as a place that people go to, to talk to one another. There isn't always people talking everywhere, but there always are people talking here. With the small groups here which congregate and so few of them in number most of the time, such as now, I wondered if there would be someone for me to speak to.

Where I was earlier, was when I was looking down on the place from above. Nobody had seen me use my wings earlier to get so high up. Nobody knows I can fly. I got to the entrance of the grounds, and walked along a path which marked the last of the empty streets, straight onto the ground I walked ahead, and when I got far enough, I turned to my left, to see two people who were chatting together. I was hesitant at first, standing away from them, looking from afar and into space, but later on I walked towards them to talk.

As I got towards them, the two people who were facing each other, two women, and as I got towards them to say "I like walking along the grass as well", the woman who was facing me, took one look at me and said "And who do you think you are coming here looking like that? Go and get lost." I froze in silence and the other woman turned around. When she did so, all she did is stare at me blankly, and then turn back around as if I was nothing to her, not even a person or living flesh, utter dust. I was shattered. I didn't know that it was possible for me to feel such things. I walked away solemnly with a heavy heart and my sluggish face intact, not knowing what to do, feeling more down than anything.

I thought that I could rectify my heart if I could find anyone else in the place who would be willing to speak to me. Sadly I couldn't find anyone to do so. The first person I walked to, gave the same reaction of the woman, only less. The second person touched my wings then decided no be controlling and not to talk to me or let the other people with him do so either. The third person was so speechless around me, and spent so much time gawking, that as soon as she opened her mouth, I decided to leave. I cannot be around people who epitomise me receptacly.

I never knew that people here could be so mean.  The day today was never supposed to be like this. It's such a cruel way for me to have to walk away from the place how I did. I hoped that someone would appear who would see me and hope to instantly be my friend, including right now if it was a compromise because of my wings. I've been the way I've always been, and right now I am too special for people. People are envious. There's so much I could do to improve the world if I was let down below, and right now where I am I have so much love to give. I wondered why someone would want to be with friends with someone, if they have everything they've ever wanted. Right now I wonder if I'll find one of the few places where people accept me, like I managed to last week. I've been in The Sanctuary for ages, and I still don't know my way around properly yet.

Author's Note

You've just read the final chapter of the series!