delta

delta- the difference, or change, in a certain quantity.

He was not the same.

He was different than he once was

and only for the worse.

His heart once loved and cared

but it had grown cold beyond recognition

and it was not phased by its own sudden change

but somehow mine was.

His words used to coat my broken soul

like honey over a sore throat.

Now his words were harsh

like the winter storm wreaking havoc

in a small, rural town.

The words took what joy and hope I had

and shrunk it too small for the human eye.

He once loved me as I had loved him

but what we had rapidly grew

into a one-sided argument with myself.

I knew that I should not love him anymore

for what had he given me in return?

But my heart could not loose the grip

that his had on mine.

I know that it is my fault that he left

and that it is stupid to complain

when I could have avoided this all along.

But where the fault lies does not change

how my mind decides to process the situation.

Maybe the fact that this was my fault

made it more difficult for my brain to process.

I wonder if he ever thinks of me

the way I do when I rest my eyes.

I wonder if when he passes by me

the urge to reach out and touch me

is as strong as my desire for him.

I wonder if I’ll ever get to know him

the way I once did.

He had changed and I knew it

but maybe he didn’t.

Maybe that was why he treated me

as if I was crazy and overdramatic.

I wanted to open his eyes

or have him look through mine

for a proper introspection.

Surely if he knew

how much he meant to me

how much I missed him

how often I thought about him

how important he was still in my life

how much he had changed,

he would change back.

Author's Note

let me have it.