Nothing

I have always been nothing to them, and someday soon it will be true

I find it quite astounding to be faced with my own insignificance

Confounded my own seclusion

What did I do to deserve this life?

To know that I don’t matter, and never will fit in, haunts me like a daydream

It is the determinate of my sin

I am a sin of omission, the lack of hidden truth, the lack of someone loving, something absent and removed

I know that I am nothing, it has taught me how to live

I’ve learned to feel lonesome even when I am surrounded

Surrounded by people who don’t see me, or maybe they do but still do not care

I am the student of apathy, uncovering my own inner abyss

I’ve passed the point of no return, cherishing the thought that I will not be missed

As I plunge into the void, descending into nothingness, traversing the unknown

Unknown world of darkness that calls me deep within

Somewhere in the twilight I hear a call like that of a friend

But no one is calling me, I know that no one’s there

If they knew me they wouldn’t call, if they knew me they wouldn’t care

I’ve reached a new acceptance, began to crave my own despair

Now that I want the darkness, what if it’s no longer there

My soul devoid of light, in my eyes no gentle glow, my heart is not breaking, it was shattered years ago

Hiding within myself, with no chance of being found, I understand that no one is looking for me, rather theyre just looking around

I do not look for blame to share, I know the cause of this loss, the loss of real intention

I pretend that nobody is there

Its easier than accepting that theyre there and nonetheless no eyes meet mine

They stare down and away, hoping that if they pretend im gone, that I will be someday

On the day I disappear they wont even know, ill be gone without a trace

And they without a clue

Will live on without me

Just like they already do