Glass

Glass

A Poem by Jb
"

I have so many good people in my life that want to help me, but I can't help myself. And really don't care about what happens to me...

"

I really do love you

Which scares me

Because I don't even love myself

I know that you care

But wish that you wouldn't

Because you shouldn't

Since the glass is teetering on the edge

Ready to shatter any moment

Shattering with your heart

That I never wanted to break

So maybe I will just take

This firey hell and make

My heart stop

Before it can break yours

Because I'm not worth living for

I'm not worth loving anymore

© 2011 Jb


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Jb
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Posted 12 Years Ago


Hi there! I hope you are doing well!

Great work! This is an interestingly written poem, you do well getting your subject matter down in a way that is easly understood and impacting. Though, I did see some areas where corrections would not be amiss; most are regarding punctuation, though some are not, I will copy your poem below, with my suggestions pointed out-

I really do love you(comma here)

Which(do not captalize) scares me

Because(do not capitalize) I don't even love myself(period here)

I know that you care(comma here)

But(do not capitalize)(perhaps add 'I') wish that you wouldn't(comma here)

Because(do not captalize) you shouldn't(semi-colon here)

Since(do not capitalize) the glass is teetering on the edge

Ready(do not capitalize) to shatter any moment(period here)

Shattering with your heart

That(do not capitalize) I never wanted to break(semi-colon here)

So(do not capitalize) maybe I will just take

This(do not capitalize) firey(fiery) hell and make

My(do not capitalize) heart stop

Before(do not capitalize) it can break yours(period here)

Because I'm not worth living for(semi-colon here)

I'm not worth loving anymore(period here)

Please remember that this review is only my opinon of your work, and any suggestions given are done so in the hopes that my words will help you to improve your craft ... Write on!





Posted 12 Years Ago


Wow, that's really putting yourself down. I'm not sure what to think about this one.
I've read the thoughts of people in this situation and telling them things will get better seems useless because they simply refuse to hear it. I can only say I hope your outlook has changed since writing this and you'll continue to find writing a cathartic release.



Posted 12 Years Ago


good work

Posted 12 Years Ago



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Added on December 21, 2011
Last Updated on December 21, 2011

Author

Jb
Jb

Youngstown, OH



About
The majority of my life has been consumed by Eating Disorders (no pun intended). I've dealt with severe Anorexia from the age of 13-19, recovered, and now struggle with Bulimia. Depression, Anxiety, a.. more..

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