A Daydream at Night

Waning moon, i look to the sky
The night star shines so bright
Where are my thoughts, so fragmented?
Erupting in galaxies bursts of panic
Entwined bodies decorate the blackness
Illustrating outlines of fragility
Tremors of sadness shift in radiance
Emphasising and switching into paralysed alignment
Aching madness sweats with wrath
Dictating and controlling a permanent stillness
Planets dance to the vision of longing
Drifting into dreams, I awake with reality
Reaching to touch the empty emotion
Ever divining, filling the cup to hold in true affiliation

 

Reviews

[Michael X]

This beautiful poem shows how dreamer dream.. in full color passion.. at the same time drawing thoughts
to certain contemplation.. enchanting effects.. your words dance to the sound of the heart beating;
pulsing to the rhythm of desire; i really enjoyed the opening sentence .."waning moon".. such analogies
are soft glances- allowing the reader a glimpse into the soul's idea of magic and love, like an overflowing
cup of yearning; sometimes all we can do is look into twilights face and surrender to the intoxicating cause,
I really enjoyed the way you entwined galaxy emotions into your brilliant words..thank you for sharing

Planets dance to the vision of longing
Drifting into dreams,

[Jane Doe Smith Rogers]

A Daydream at Night beautifully speaks of moonlight madness.

[Nicole Clarice Anna Wie..]

Through reading this, i grew to enjoy it. For me, it started off a bit rocky. But you had me at "Entwined bodies decorate the blackness". I felt the poem was solid after that line, but i'm not sure what i think of the 4 lines before it. Maybe the wording was off for me, and i wasn't quite sure of the flow. But overall i did enjoy this. I found it to be quite abstract in your choice of words. Very creative, quite different from the norm, and i hope to read more from u soon.

PS. welcome to the cafe :)

[MY]

Well written, leaves with a vision of the level between awake and sleeping.

[WordMaster]

Wonderfully written

"Waning moon, I took to the sky" - great opening line

Clearly, you need to keep writing

[Writer CW Kirkland]

I really like your style of writing, and this poem was well-written. The flow of the poem is easy to follow, and the first line of the poem grabs the reader's attention right away. I like the combination of words you used (i.e., "Emphasising and switching into paralysed alignment"). Thank you for sharing your writing on the Cafe, and I look forward to reading more in the future. Best wishes!