Patience

I'm not very patient

Everyone keeps telling me patience is key

But I never seem to listen

I lie in my bed unable to rest because I am impatient

I am eager for the future, and do not wish to wait

If life had a remote control, the fast forward button would be worn down

All I want to do is know

But we aren't allowed to right away

I also rush through almost everything

Anything you can imagine, even the simplest of things

I hope efficiency follows in my footsteps

Or else my work is a complete mess

Most of this feels forced, because I want to accomplish my dreams

But everything will come in due time

Well, will it really? 

I jitter and I jolt, my body is like a four year old on caffeine

And my mind follows in its footsteps 

I can not bear to wait 

I never would if I had the choice

I show up right on time, not a minute early or late

Oh boy do I hate to wait

I need to learn how to calm and slow down

Or I feel I will drive myself mad

Everything will come together

The puzzle doesn't come in the box already solved,

And you wont solve it right away

I must learn how to wait

I need to be patient.

Reviews

[dan]

Ricky, If this poem is an indication of what comes next, I am certainly willing to wait (no poetic-pun intended). You have a nice, fluid writing style (at least in this write...you can change that style with every piece) that shows a lot of promise. Your flow is good, your wordplay even better..."a puzzle doesn't come in the box already solved..." is a captivating and quotable line. Very nice write, sir! Keep it up. take care...dan

[Ashley Dawn Proctor]

Very good poem. It's true and It's reality.

[Shari Robinson]

This is a good poem, there's some really interesting imagery there.

[FireBird99]

Hi! This is a pretty cool poem =).

I jitter and I jolt, my body is like a four year old on caffeine

I have seen this happen haha. My nephew got into my coffee. The worst part was I was stuck with him for the day. It was not fun xD.

[Jamestown]

Yes my friend patience is a virtue! Just don't pray for it, God tends
to take patience way to serious, old church joke:) I think your last
stanza says it all, great write, Thanks for sharing and b-blessed!

[RiverRei]

Edits:

Line 3 - change I am, to I'm. I think it would help with the flow a bit more
Line 5 - take out the word "control". I would be surprised if anyone would think the remote you are talking about is anything besides a remote control lol. You can also take out the word "button". Not necessary, in my opinion.
Line 6 - know what? It's a little unclear so you may want to add a bit to this line
Line 7 - I may just be weird but "right away" sounds out of place to me. Try saying "at first". I have no idea why but that sounds better to me lol
Line 17 - cannot is one word...just the grammar nazi in me lol

Overall review:
I liked this :) I can definitely relate. At work (yay day job haha), they keep telling me I need to slow down because I work too fast so this is something I'm very used to. I like your choice of words though, I could definitely see a picture of my head of a situation where I couldn't and didn't want to wait but had to, etc. Very good work, thanks for the read request :)

Side note: I'm surprised you are only 16. Your writing is so good I thought you were older, and you look older in your picture. Not too old though, only around 20 haha.

[Nadia Gerassimenko]

"I jitter and I jolt, my body is like a four year old on caffeine" HAH! That is an awesome imagery, although kinda scary!

Oh, I used to be so impatient when I was your age. I think it's all the raging hormones (not sexually) and the feeling of like you're stuck in an in-between...you're not a kid anymore, but you're not an adult either. And it feels frustrating that you can't pick one box and stick to it.

Don't worry my friend. Patience comes with time and experience, you will see. You will master it if you want to. The key is to try to focus on the present moment on what you are doing and if your mind wanders off to the future, you bring your thoughts back to the present.

[Honey.K]

Patience IS the key, although its really hard I know ;)
Good job it's really nice.. I liked the flow of words .