Flight or Fight

I called Alex and she was all too happy about coming over. She asked me if Theo and I were down and I answered it seemed like it. I didn't expect her to show sympathy but every time she amazes me. When she got here I was sprawled out on the couch bored to death. She waltzed in like she hadn't taken her damn sweet time.
- Hey Pon Pon nice place.
- Yeah I guess.
- So what do you want to do
She walked over and sat on my lap. Without warning I kissed her. It almost felt like she melted into my grasp and I pulled her closer. It was nowhere as delightful as with Theo but it will have to do. She broke the kiss to breath and smiled. I saw a picture of Theo and to keep myself from crying I kissed her again. I didn't even realize it when I pulled her towards my room. I did hear the door click when we were in the hallway and when Alex was pulled away. Right then I realized Theo was the person who had came through the door. Theo stepped forward and I stumbled back and fell on my broken hand. Tears welled up in my eyes not because of the physical pain but the mental. I half crawled and ran into my room. I heard Theo talking to Alex and waited for her to leave. When she did I came out of my room just as Theo was going to his. When I saw his face I wasn't scared just extremely sad. He tried to stop me in my tracks but I said
- Excuse me
And put my head down cause I knew I was crying. He touched my hand and it made me cry even more. The warmth that I hadn't felt in too long was standing beside me. I wanted to hug him but couldn't. I tried to run but he pulled me towards him and held me as I cried on his shoulder.
- Why do you always run when things get tough?
- it's easier that way.
I whispered. I looked up at him and saw that he had tears in his eyes as well but he was smiling. This how it's supposed to be but I have to be the strict one. It doesn't make any sense but I have to do it anyway.
- Fight or flight Theo
- I don't know Pon Pon
- I'm serious will you fight for me or will you fly away and leave me to die. Alone.
He leaned down and pulled me to the ground with him. He sat me on his lap and kissed my neck. He took broken hand and after a second cried on my shoulder.
- I'm so sorry Simon
I stayed quiet because I knew that was what I was supposed to do.
- I never meant to hurt you. I just saw you with Alex and then I thought you were better off with her. It's just the way you guys looked together, so perfect.
- Why didn't you tell me?
- Because I didn't know what to do.
- Not about that, you a*s hole! About your marriage proposal!
- How did you find out?
- From your mother and trust me you could have kept your secret safe if you hadn't decided to run off like a p***y!
When he didn't answer I stood up and carried on.
- Why the f**k do you think it's okay to keep secrets from a boy who has been in love with you since the first day he laid eyes on you?! You know what I thought after I heard the news? I said to myself f**k it! If this man doesn't care enough about me to NOT keep me in the dark then how about I call up someone who does!
- Alex
- Yeah but when I kissed her....
I broke down crying again.
- I didn't feel the same warmth from her as I felt from... From you.
- Oh Simon.
- Is this what you do? You make people fall in love with you and then when you feel your mission is finished you ditch through the shadows?! I fell in love with you because I felt secure with you but all I feel now is hatred! And I never wanted to feel that way with you!
I fell to my knees in front of him and looked him straight in the eyes.
- Fight or flight?
He sat the silently.
- God damn Theo! Fight or flight?!
- I don't know.
- Then I'm leaving this is the end of us. Thanks for ruining it.
I got up and grabbed 'ditch' bag and ran out the front door. I guess I chose flight.