For Marion

I lost my dear friend to breast cancer last July.

                          

Tonight the sky hangs sodden clouds to dry

Along the line of leafless trees.  I stop

To watch them drip. Geese beat their wings and cry

Along the snowy ridge, then coast and drop

Into the pond.  I stand so still I hear

The breathing of the air, the pulsing rush

That stirs beneath the white, the cold, the fear.

I wonder how it feels to die.  Dark crush

Upon your chest:  one breast, one fight, one scar.

Imagined shadows pull these thin fears tight

Around my limbs.  Clouds part, one falling star

Descends.  A new moon rises.  Silent night.

Beside this deep, black pool where geese now sleep,

Where laden clouds bow down, I kneel, I weep.

 

Reviews

[Adam Whitworth]

some very lyrical lines here

[Shaun Rudie]

I was easily taken in by the imagery. Pulled along with your experience. "Breathing of the air", "thin fears", "black pool where geese now sleep" Very rich, touching.

[Ed Hart]

how excellent...

[J]

This was a beautifully penned sonnet, it really was. The imagery, the enjambment, the end-rhymes which were barely noticeable, truly.

A fine eulogy, a pure requiem.

[Phibby Venable]

this is so beautiful and moves along so very well. It has a
great deal of heart and beat to it.

Upon your chest: one breast, one fight, one scar.
Imagined shadows pull these thin fears tight
Around my limbs. I watch one falling star
Descend. Very Fine!!

[R J Askew]

Very moving. The geese seem so symbolic. They are us and the black pool is death. Tis strong. And we will all find out how it feels to go there.

[Wildfleour]

I feel your sense of loss and this is a beautiful tribute to your friend, Marion.

[Wildfleour]

I missed your writing, my friend. You paint powerful images with your words.

[Frank Terino]

the powerful way your words took me to another place and time is enchanting, a real pleasure to read.