Second Best

Sometimes I feel like I don't matter.

Second best.

Shouldn't parents treat there kids like equals?

I know I'm a handful.

I get into trouble sometimes.

But shouldn't they love me just the same?

They do I'm sure.

Maybe they don't realize.

She's older.

Going to college soon.

They're proud of Her.

Are they proud of me?

What have I done to earn it?

I'm good at my sports.

Always one of the best on the team.

I know they see it.

They have told me.

But with being the best,

Living up to expectations,

The disappointment that comes when I fail.

It can be worse then a punishment.

Do I have to be like her?

I certainly don't want to be.

We are two different people.

Different minds.

Different ideas.

What if I don't want to go to college for sports?

I'm not smart enough for a academic scholarship.

They will have to pay.

Then I would never be the favorite.

"Dad I don't want to play basketball next year."

"So you're just going to sit around and do nothing?"

"I just need more time for school."

"This season just ended, you'll change your mind."

I played the next year.

I saw how happy he was when I had 17 points our first game.

Mom too.

"Mom can I go to the movies?"

"Have any money?"

"Could you give me some money?"

"What have you done to earn it?"

I don't know.

I guess the answer is nothing.

"Mom can I go bowling with some friends?"

"Yeah be back by 12. Heres $30."

What has she done to earn it?

Being born first I suppose.

Will I always be second best?

When she goes to college this summer,

Will I have a chance?

I can't tell the future.

And that's that scariest part of life.

Reviews

[therisa]

Oh Jane, I understand your frustration, about feeling second best, when compared, against your sister. How everything you do, appears not to be up to their standards, but parents do forget, sometimes, and use the same yardstick, when measuring the two of you. Have you approached your parents, with this concern of your's? Just to remind them, you and your sister, are two different people. If you feel comfortable, this poem would be a great opening line for this discussion. Hoping writing this poem, has helped you, to vent these feeling in a constructive way.

[Pmasters]

I was searching for a photo to put with my blog on feeling second best when I came across your poem. I know so many people who share these feelings thanks for sharing them so openly. If you get a chance read my blog on feeling second best: http://tsmadvice.blogspot.com/2012/01/advice-on-feeling-second-best.html

[KellieJeanne]

I can really relate. This is touching and sad, but heart warming at the same time to people who can relate. Lets some of us know that we are not alone out there.

[HopelesslyDevoted]

god... this is an all too familiar feeling for me at the moment... great poem though