Panic after the Nightmare

After lunch we had to split up, with reluctance of course and I went to my chemistry class, still feeling a horrible pain in my back. I got up to the class room and sat down in the cold metal desk, the coldness of it felt nice, but not the metal. When the teacher walked in I realized I had forgotten my notebook, so I had her sign a pass and went back down to my locker. When I was rounding the corner after the stairs I saw two people, I leaned around the corner and realized it was Ari and Neria. They were laughing! And he was holding her closely. Neria said my name and I heard Ari respond with “she is so easy to lead along, I think she’s really quite pathetic”

And Neria laughed hysterically at this. Then she said “so our plan is still working?” he nodded and kissed her lightly on the cheek then went down the hall in the opposite direction from me, she followed like the perfect little s**t she is.

            I felt so betrayed! I was angry, upset, and all around pissed! I went to my locker grabbed my cell phone and bag and left, I snuck out the back hall and was almost to my car when I saw Nolan, skipping class, and leaning against a wall near my car. I opened my door and started the car, but I couldn’t see anything through the tears I just realized I was crying. Nolan came to the door and looked at me with eyes that looked surprisingly soft for charcoal. He gently grabbed my wrist pulled me from the car and pulled me to the passenger side, wordlessly he got in the driver’s side and pulled away from the school. Once we were away from the school, he spoke “where do you live” was all he said. I gave him my address and he took me home. The silence was nice. I needed to think, I looked over at him and his eyes were hard charcoal again. When I saw his eyes, something in me hardened, I was done. That was the final blow, my emotions have gotten the best of me too many times, and now I was in control. When we got to my house I invited him in, since he clearly didn’t have a way to get anywhere. We went inside and I went straight to the kitchen got Tylenol, water, and asked if he wanted anything. He didn’t. so I directed him to the couch in the living room and I sat in the recliner. I turned on the television with no intent to watch it. I threw the remote to him and he turned it to some movie from the 80’s, I quickly fell asleep, and at 2:30 I woke up. He was sitting there quietly, and I asked him where he lived, we left my house and I took him home. When I got back to my house I went upstairs to my room. I sat on my bed thinking again. I don’t know why I was so quick to trust Ari, what was this s**t he was feeding me? Well whatever it was I was done.

            At three o’clock I turned my phone on and found it flooding with texts from Ari, he wanted to know where I was. well the chances of him receiving a reply were unlikely. Then I heard a knock. I went to the door but I already knew who would be standing there. Of course it was Ari. He went to grab my hand, he had a false look of worry painted on his face, but before he could get near me I stepped away, and he stepped inside. I slammed the door, and calmly looked at him and said “I think you’re really quite pathetic. Maybe you should leave”

When I said this his face turned white, he knew I had caught him. And he went to make some excuse but I interrupted him before he could. “I think you should leave now.” My voice was a little more harsh and loud. He made another grab for my hand, I avoided looking in his eyes knowing I would melt there, and now I screamed a long rant “I regret meeting you, if you ever try to see or talk to me again you will regret it. I saw you with your little s**t, and whatever plans you have concerning me need to stop. You need to get out NOW because I am done with you!” all the while I had been herding him towards the door and at the last word he stumbled backwards with a look of disbelief on his face. As soon as he was out of the door I slammed it and slid down against it. I was tired, so I decided I would go upstairs and sleep. And trust me I slept, I dreamt I was in a forest, and it was wonderful, it was green and peaceful, I felt whole there. I didn’t wake up till 5 am the next morning and when I did I knew what I would do about Ari. Clearly I couldn’t avoid him as I wished, because I had five classes with him and switching my schedule was dumb, but I would act as if nothing had happened as if I had never met him past the words “Hey I’m Ari”. He didn’t exist to me anymore. 

I got ready for school and made myself more presentable than the day before. I straightened my hair, wore my black skinny jeans, black flats and a purple blouse, I thought I looked more collected than before. I got to school fairly early so I went to my locker, grabbed a book I was supposed to read for composition class, and I sat down and read. I had been reading for about five minutes when someone sat next to me, I figured it was Ari, but as I looked up I saw that it was Nolan, I smiled at him, and he semi-smiled back. He sat there quietly, and I enjoyed the silence, I felt like he was watching out for me and being something of a friend, having watched my slight breakdown yesterday. Eventually the bell rang and I went to my first period Government class. I sat through class and was much more focused than the day before, and for some reason I felt like I was stronger now.