NIRVANA

"I think of six impossible things before breakfast and impossible becomes possible when you think it is."

-Alice in Wonderland

Believing is the most important thing that connects the unseen from reality as Alice Kingsleigh created her own world of fantasy, striving beyond what is seen with or without assurance of it as existence or not, yet a little barrier separates me from her, because I only think of one significant dream I can give to myself and that is 'real happiness'. Quite simple to be ponder upon by an individual and so as ironic, for how could one aspire something that's already there? True, that it could be the simplest thing the way world can see it, but in fact it's

the hardest to achieve.

At the age of 12, I started to believe on real happiness, how and what it really feels like, so I pursue higher and deeper towards, what my theory suggests will delve the realm of happiness I've been searching of, 'success'. Revolving within the three corners of my community; home, church, school, where I spent most of my life, pushed me to see the social significance of success, aspired by many, thinking it'll be the best way towards my dream. School influenced me the most, continuing the path I once chose and focused more on academic achievements; to top the exam, to be an honor student, to win in competitions, for me seen to outgrow the first taste of success. My accomplishments step on to the next as days gone by, until my overjoyed attainments slowly embraced me as an ordinary walks of life.

Halfway on my journey I met a crossroad, to no one I could speak or cry no more, for none befriended me except change. Just as soon as looking back, I discovered that the nearer I step towards excellence, the lesser the happiness I achieve, then I started to ask myself, "Is this really what brings happiness or am I just being superficial?" I can't remember the last time I mingled with my friends, the hours my mom and I talked or even the chances I smiled for stupid things. God provides me with a second chance, to once more put the faith in my own palm, to

rotate my world over again.

So I choose in the middle of what I'm reaching and who I'd become. It's not about the number of certificates, medals or trophies acquired, it is the little appreciation on what you do, contentment on what you have/become and satisfaction from the things around you.

Alice twisted hopelessness to a possibility further, I can say more than that, because I already turned possibility into probability. Happiness is a puzzle made of pieces you can't find, yet I stepped back just to get those pieces, for at the peak of success is an empty box where there's a chance to assemble completely every piece of joy I once set aside in life. Its funny thinking that the thing I gave away is the very thing I'd been looking for.

"Not what we have but what we use,

not what we see but what we choose,

these are things that men or bless human

happiness."

-Joseph Newton-

Author's Note

..the title speaks of the grunge metal band 'nirvana'
..inspired by Kurt Cobain
=]

Reviews

[CHRIS ANDES]

this is an essay from the heart!!!......

[Coyote Poetry]

Thank you for the amazing wisdom. I agree with your words. The quotes are true and we lived by them. World would be a better place. Need great hope and many dreams. Life is good friends, laughter and good conversation. A few adventures don't hurt along the way. Thank you for the excellent story.
Coyote