You Still Haunt Me

They say time heals everything

If that’s true then when will I stop bleeding?

Crying

Praying

When will I stop pleading?

I had a bright light in my eyes

And you took that away from me

Every single time I cried

And every single time you laughed in response

I don’t understand why you had to prey on me

I’m your god dam child

Covered with sweat

I’m awake and afraid

But still lying in my bed

I keep seeing my assault in my head

I reach under my pillow and pull out my knife

Slice slice

Now I can go back to sleep

 

 

Author's Note

I have writers block like to the tenth power. But here you go.

Reviews

[The Night Poet]

Dear Dove,
Sadly, many of us have gone through excruciating experiences. Experiences like these and like other situations can become a lesson for us in Forgiveness. If I may share with you what made a difference in my healing from abuse.
Thank you for your generous listening and consideration.
Forgiveness
“People often don’t understand what is involved in forgiving. They think that if somebody does something wrong, and you forgive them, that is like saying that it was all right to do it that time – but don’t dare do it again. But life doesn’t work that way; it’s hypocritical to forgive someone on that basis. If somebody does something, you can be sure that he or she will do it again.
“That is why I prefer to talk about ‘making space’ and ‘completion.” To the extent that forgiveness is involved, it is more like self-forgiving and self-acceptance. When you forgive yourself
for something, you have to create the space for that thing to exist. For whatever you resist,
and fail to make space for, will indeed manifest itself in you.

“Self-forgiving, and self- accepting is an essential part of being complete in relationships. If there is something about your past that you are ashamed of, or guilty about – if there is something in it that you are hanging on to – if there is something there that you are using to burden another person – that will prevent you from being complete in your relationships. “In order to transcend having to be any particular type of person, you have to make it all right with yourself to be that type of person. The moment when you really experience that you have created yourself being whatever way you are, at the same moment you will never have to be that way again.

“This self-forgiving, self-acceptance, goes hand in hand with forgiving others, making space for others, completing your relationships with others. You cannot be complete in a relationship with any person whom you do not admire and respect as he or she is, and as he or she is not – rather than the way you think she is or would like her to be. Love for a person is acceptance of him or her the way he is and the way he is not.
“So long as you do not know who you really are, this will be difficult. You may have to give up
a lot of things to which you may be attached. You may have to give up your resentments, your anger, your upset, your annoyance, your desire to punish.”
-Werner Erhard, from Werner Erhard, The Transformation of a Man

[Drizzle]

You will be fine .Just hold on because a better day will come when you will be free. I like your poem

[Sarah Hampton]

You are not alone, I too understand what it is like to have the monster on the wrong side of the door. Stay brave.

[Fire Mage Andrea]

there was a twist there - I thought it was for a lost love at first
but it seems to be more of a family thing - an abusive parent perhaps?
it's quite dark at the end too

[luvingu01]

this sadness berets the person, the poet within but humility will bring you back some bliss and the war in your heart will be over and soon there will be no sadness that could ever deride you or deprive you of feeling life passion and sunfelt kiss

[Maskedthoughts]

Wow this is very powerful and made me feel a lot sadness and pain about the subject matter and what happened. The way you put it all into words is truly profound its a piece of art. Great write!

[Ruth]

To purge and release, this holds such power! A great piece showing the reader such turmoil, they can feel it! Precise and seething..love this! xoxo

[dreaming dame]

:) Tenth power is rather high, :) Especially to write something so... sadly ... I'd say beautiful, but it's not a beautiful thing that happens. Wonderful poem. :)

[Zachary_James]

dark. Mysterious. AMAZING
Great job.

[Crystal Marie Dreier]

Yes this is really good and I dont see the writers block! I get it all the time. You cant let it get to you!!! Good job and I do belive Ima read some more by you! This really inspired me to read more by you!

Sincerly,
Crystal M.