It's the Sometimes

Sometimes,

Life,

strikes home...

Sometimes,

the fire along the walls comes creeping up,

and as we sit alone and watch the flames,

we fear they are coming closer.

They want to change us because we are but an obstacle in their path,

and they need the fuel.

We need to become a flame,

to resist the flame,

but it's hard when the flame calls on you to,

 change.

The smoke that furls around your eyes,

ears,

nose,

mouth,

that drowns your senses confuses you.

What is wrong or right?

Up or down?

It doesn't matter to the fire.

Because you are bad,

you are not a flame,

so move,

change,

become a flame.

With a light so bright and air so warm,

it invites you in.

So you try to change for the flame so that it will let you in.

But as you are changing the flames that stood idly by the doors and walls that sat and watched and flicked their flames suddenly spring to life because now you have moved.

The light is no more because now all you can see is the smoke all around you that chokes you because the fire never wanted you anyhow but you never knew.

And the fires of hell open up all around you and suddenly the flames are everywhere and the heat is so bad you have to get away but the room where you sat safe and sound is now burned and black and you can't go back so you try something different to hopefully release the white hot mess that licks up your throat and teases you. With tears in your eyes you take the knife sitting beside you, put down the meal you've been eating, take up the drink that sloshes from side to side as you run around looking for another way out until you realize what you have to do and so with that drink in your hand, the knife in your other or yourself so empty,

you open your skin or blur the world so that the icyness or the numbness that comes from what you've done makes the flames jump back because you are too cool to touch or you can't feel the pain.

And suddenly that is your only escape so you find a place to sit and again you use the knife, the hunger, or the drink to keep the flames away because as soon as the wound closes over and the blurryness from the world disappears the flames come back as hot as the sun itself that once gave you light but now is just an excuse to run away.

So you change,

whether you know it or not.

Because now that the flames have come all around you and their is no way out all you can do is smile and keep on trucking through because that smile too confuses the flames because the smile too is filled with ice so it pushes and pushes the fire off your case but sometimes you still have to go back and you do oh so often because now you are weak and there is no way out of the heat so you have to keep being icy otherwise those waves of flames will come.

And suddenly the flames turns to water and the world tries to drown you as you tread the water but it's hard to hold on and there isn't any traction so you numb yourself again and this time you realize that the strength you had before is gone and you aren't going to last any longer.

So you stop treading and a raft appears because you need something to hold onto and even though it is small it's enough for a while and as you climb on the flames come back and soon the whole wide world is filled with flames and water. 

The water feeding off the flames and the flames feeding off water in a sort of universal paranormal connection that you can't understand with a common goal to turn you into one of the two but you can't fight much longer and you are all alone on your raft so you lie down and close you eyes and choke as the water and smoke fills you and this time you know you are all alone because no one can save you when there is so much trying to get you so as you lie and wait for judgment day.

And as the waves come crashing again and the red flames fill your eyes and ears and confuse you again, with one final attempt you try to fend them off but because you can't see or hear you try to hard and your body then falls and your mind goes dark and with one final pump and plea your heart fails to keep you alive.

In the sometimes that happened, 

as you wait for the flames to take over, you never realized the other person running beside you. The one who led you away from the room before it went up and flames and convinced you to run away and the turmoil licked at your heels and throat and when you couldn't speak because the flames were too hot they gave you their voice but you wouldn't take it because you thought you were alone. And when they saw you in the sea about to drown they gave you their raft so they would tread the water and you could run away but you stayed and now they have to watch as everything they loved comes crashing down. They hold you hand as the water takes you away, 

down,

down,

 to a place where they can never see you again. And they kiss you on the cheek and tell you they love you even though you will never be able to hear. 

Because in the sometimes that happen,

there's a someone else,

who was always there to begin with.