Mar de Sombras

This is a better title than before, but it's in Spanish... I don't like it in English... well, what to do?

Graceful it leaps,

Bounds and dances.

Beautiful it watches,

Long and Lankey,

Slim and Slender.

Happiness radiates

From its epicenter,

Natural and Good

 

I am the opposite,

With no grace or poise,

Beauty has not graced

My face.  Slim and

Slender I am not.

Happiness is an emotion

I have never known.

 

My shadow loves life

Like I do not.

Author's Note

any better title suggestions?

Reviews

[Snookered]

I really like the juxtaposition of the subject and their shadow. The first part I was wondering what it was exactly that you were writing about until the very end, a nice touch on a sad poem.

Oh and, as far as a title goes, you could maybe have it as Shadow in another language? Sombra is shadow in spanish so maybe that? I dunno, unless you wanted the shadow element to be unknown until the end. Just an idea =]