The Future Fear

This afternoon
I sat in the waiting room
Of a breast cancer screening office
As a moral support for a friend
Who had follow up tests
Done upon her breasts.

Have to admit
This entire experience
Spooked me.

For this could be
Me
In nine years
From now.

Having already gone through
One cancer scare
When I was 15-16 years old
Facing the possibility
Of the surgeon amputating
One of my testicles.

The countless examination
Of my Prostate gland
Two ultrasounds
Before the big event
Surgery
Only to find
A water sac.

Not sure
I could handle this process
Again
With regards to cancer.

The thought of having
A mastectomy performed
Yet alone
A biopsy done
Again
Scares me.

As my body becomes
A road map
Of exploratory surgeries
And disfiguring scars.