Almost 1491 Days

An upcoming anniversary.

In 17 days

I'll be marking

A new milestone

In my long battle

With depression.

The fourth anniversary

Since my last suicide attempt

During the holiday season

Of 2010-2011.

Won't lie

Still have

The occasional thought

Of suicide.

Except

It exists

As background noise.

Although

The root causes

Remain constant

In my life.

As I struggle

To address them.

Often

Feeling like

I'm dirty

Or worse

Diseased.

Needing to

Cleanse myself

Before I can advance

In my healing.

Knowing

My recovery

Must be taken

And measured

On a "day-to-day" basis.

Celebrating

The small steps

Achieved.

Author's Note

Written December 21, 2014.