Why At This Time?

Oh

Goddess

Please forgive me

But am feeling

So insecure

At the moment.

As if

Someone will

Publicly expose me

As a freak

And fraud.

In

Calling myself

A woman

When I have

Male genitalia

Between my legs

Still.

Know

Am trying hard

To live my life

In a honest

And open way.

Yet

My physical body is

A conflicting war zone

Where both female

And male sex characteristics

Are present.

Why

After almost four years

Of taking hormones

Is this arising

Now?

Does

This mean

I have reach

The point

Which my sanity is

At risk?

Like

Six years ago

When I broke down

Mentally.

Forced

To pick up

All of the pieces

On my own.

Except now

Am facing

Possible hospitalize

Should it get

Beyond my control.

Oh Goddess

How I wish

I knew the answers

Face me.

Please

Give the strength

To find them

Together.

Author's Note

Originally written August 19, 2012.

Reviews

[therisa]

Thanks, N!LoC.

[N!LoC]

xoxo